little fishies

Some Dr. Seuss

2011-12-03T11:26:00.000-05:00

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”

“Being crazy isn't enough.”

“You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So... get on your way!”

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good.”

“All alone! Whether you like it or not, alone is something you'll be quite a lot!”

“You can get help from teachers, but you are going to have to learn a lot by yourself, sitting alone in a room.”

“Why fit in when you were born to stand out?”

“He who makes a beast out of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man.”

“Things may happen and often do to people as brainy and footsy as you”

September?

2011-09-21T18:46:00.001-04:00

Why am I averaging 1 blog post every few months?

I'm sorry I've become so super distant and removed, guys. Guys? Are you still there...?

Well, I know there's at least 2 of you still paying attention. So, thanks :)

I seem to have plateaued in my creativity, & spirituality. I'm mostly content to just chill on the couch on my down time, and by chill I mean sleep. I work, and I nap. It's what I do.

Ok, well, I did bust out with some creativity the other day and made a cake for one of my local besties, Sara. Wanna see? Ok. Here it is.

She liked it.
See?

Then we shared it.

These girls are all smiling cause I made them cake.

Or maybe it was b/c we all made this painting for Sara that turned out kind of awesome.

So....
Happy September 21st!

P.S. I ate these raw oysters the other day with a cute boy. I fibbed and told him, I'd had them before, duh, who hasn't? Psh... and then I ate them, and was like NOM NOM NOM NOM... THEETH ARE REALLY GOOooD NOM NOM NOM.... (then I sneaked a pic with my phone so I could tell ya about it later.) The end.

Sunday Funday

2011-07-03T10:03:00.000-04:00

So, hi guys!

How's about an update?

Back in May, I had my dance recital and it was SO cute and FUN and perfect. What a great way to end a great year of learning and growth and cutie pies. Believe it when I say that I don't have a single picture or video clip from that day. I was too busy running that show, and all the people that promised to give me pictures of the day or send me video have not. Jerks. So, sorry. I promise, it happened in real life.

My first year of business was a blessed one. I learned a lot. The end.

Florida is incredible. I love LOVE love living here. I mean, Richmond VA is amazing, and I loved living there and it will forever hold an enormous place in my heart, but Fla? Tis' another place for me to call home.

Tallahassee continues to grow on me. I'll admit, at first I wasn't so sure about this college town, but the more I live here, and especially now that I'm living in a new part of town, I couldn't be happier (unless I had a beach house in St. Petersburg)

Which brings me to my next point, I drive down to Tampa and St. Petersburg every chance I get. It's about 4 hours away, but worth the drive. I WISH that it was in the cards for me to live down there, but for now, it simply is not. But suffice it to say Tampa Bay area was built for a girl like me. Love the people, love the restaurants, love the activity, love the weather, love the area. Love, love, love, love love.

So, hey, guess what? I'm training for a marathon! I decided it's time. It's been an item on my "Bucket List" for years and now I'm serious about it.

Some good movies I've seen lately include: Jane Eyre, and Midnight at Paris and Secretariat. All of them some of the best I've ever seen. For those of you with kiddos, Secretariat is a true story about a rad horse that makes you want to cry when you watch him run in the races. I was literally cheering out loud for him and tearing up. Man, I don't know what it is about boxing movies and animal movies, but I lose it every time.

Good books- the Book of Mormon, Anna Karenina, Jane Eyre, As a Man Thinketh, How to Win Friends and Influence People, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and Attached.

These aren't books you've never heard of, but I'm currently reading all of them. And they're all superb. Oh actually, you might not have heard about Attached. It's a book about the 3 attachment styles of love, written by a couple of doctors. If you're in love and have some problems understanding your mate, or wish you were in love read it. It's the newest research. An LDS psychologist recommended it to me (he's my home teacher. No, I'm not in therapy....although I should be, and sort of am already getting free sessions....) Anywho, girls, read the book, it's pretty brill.

Yesterday, a girlfriend of mine and I went on a an adventure and it was AWEsome. Tallahassee is about 30 minutes from a river that comes from a Spring called Wakulla. It's so clean and clear you could literally drink it as you swim in it, and it's the most refreshing temperature. (last week I was at the beach and the water was so warm, believe that I was disappointed... it was just too warm! haha Has that ever been a complaint in Idaho??)

Yes there are alligators in the water, and yes, I swam in it. Here's the thing, I know what you're thinking. The alligators are going to get me! No. Alligators are present, but during the day they're either on the banks or back far in the trees. They're cold blooded, so they sun during the day, hunt during the night. Furthermore, they're non aggressive, unlike crocodiles. They are afraid of humans and leave whenever you come near. AND what's more, is the water is so clear you could see it coming if you got a half retarded one that thought it was night and you were a bird.

Here are come picts of the day. I'm pretty sure that tomorrow I'm going to do the exact same thing I did yesterday.

Look a manatee! Neat-o!

That thing on it's fin is a tracking device.

Taking a breather, right by my kayak.

Look over yonder! A creeeeature!

So, it's like a felony to touch the manatees. So I can't really say, but they may or may not have felt rough with hair, like an elephant.

Here I am randomly taking picts and this guy happened to be cruising passed us and didn't mind smiling for the camera! haha! cute adventure boy.

Sharing some grub

Um. Don't look at my dorky expression, note the manatees in the back making my life awesome.

Obviously we didn't swim in this part of the river. See the baby alligator in the vegetation!

Beauties.

The dark part of the water is the sea weed. I hate sea weed! Bah! You never know what sort of creatures are hiding in there! At one point during our adventure we came across some people shucking scallops and they saw we were (such geeks) sharing one pathetic and old pair of goggles, so they offered to let us borrow their masks and snorkels. We gladly accepted and swam around and to the bottom of the river searching for Seminole artifacts. Didn't find anything... oh well! It was amazing!

This is me in my element, being nothing but pure awesome. Can you see the 2 little girls standing on the platform next to me? They were so funny! So I'm up there preparing to jump, and wondering if the water is too shallow here and 1 of the girls speaks up and is like "oh no, it's not too shallow, if you jump like this and then pull your feet up like this, you won't even touch the bottom or the sea weed, and so I'm like, ok sure, and run and take a jump. When I climb back up there, the girls are hesitating to jump, so I ask them what they're doing. They laugh and admit it was their first time jumping and were a little scared! haha!!! They tricked me!

This is one of my favorite pictures taken of me of all time. It's just so awkward and hilarious. I'm like... "wait, hold on, hold on, let me hold my nose. I got this."

Gator! This lil dude was the only guy I saw all day, (he's the same gator in the other pic) Isn't he precious!

Happy Fourth of July tomorrow! Yay America! Yay freedom!

No big deal.

2011-05-12T10:32:00.000-04:00

So, I moved into a new place equipped with a full sized rottweiler. No big deal.
I had fleas for a week. No big deal.
Just held my first dance recital. No big deal.
Spent the afternoon at Anna Maria island/Heaven on Earth. nbd
Am currently hanging out in a top floor, corner office in downtown Tampa. No big deal.

(One or more or all of the above items may or may not be, in fact, big deals.)

Note.
Is it just me, or is it incredible every single time you look down from an airplane or a skyscraper? I've been to this office more than a dozen times and it always takes my breath away. It's a big deal.

The new man in my life.

2011-05-04T16:34:00.003-04:00

Just look at this face! Don't be fooled by the small photograph. This kid weighs over 80 pounds; he's huge! (and so adorable.)

I'm a foster mommy now for this adolescent Rottweiler. His name is Big Boy, but I took the liberty of renaming him Wesley. He likes it better. He thinks it sounds more refined, and reflects his personality in a more positive light. I think he actually IS a big boy and needs some training. He's been neglected and malnourished, poor thing.

He's absolutely as sweet as can be, and we've become tight friends over the past week, although it feels like a few weeks. I've seen him interact with other humans, and what melts my heart is he clearly favors me over all others. He is very friendly to everyone though, except for that one time when a friend came over, through the back gate. Quiet, nonvocal, jolly Wes surprised me by standing in front and barking twice in a protective manner. I reassured him the intruder was a friend. Good boy. hehe

This is sort of like one of those lease-to-own deals, where Wesley and I could potentially become a permanent family. That idea is becoming less daunting to me, the more I spend time with him, and the more I watch The Dog Whisperer.

I'm pretty much in love with him... sigh. When he's around, I feel like I can just be myself you know? Goofy and snuggly. He doesn't mind my current obsession with non-stop watching of Seinfeld. He doesn't mind that I talk to him in baby voice or that I can't run as fast as he can. He's protective of me, and basically the perfect man.

The only problem is the fleas. He's got em, and now so do I. Well, until yesterday. We had the Critter Getters come in and bomb the whole house and yard, and he got a good scrubbing. But man, look what I have had to deal with!

It's been a trial, but Wes is worth the trouble. I'm already completely smitten, head over heels.

I'm still here!

2011-04-07T21:22:00.000-04:00

Update!

I'm going to dedicate a future blog post for the subject of my work, so I'm not going to say much here on the matter. And you'll have to wait a little over a month for it. Sorry, but don't worry, it'll be worth the wait :) All I will say now, is that a month from today is our recital and these lil darlings are going to be positively edible. I love my girls!

As you may know, I took up horseback riding last summer, and have been off and on taking lessons for the past several months. Unfortunately, that has ceased indefinitely. I have to be careful with the risks I choose to take with my body since I make my living moving and grooving. It makes me mildly sad, I do love my foggy, early morning rides with those majestic creatures. I promise myself I will take it up again, when the time is right.

I've started running again, and I participate in ultimate frisbee most Saturday mornings. This Saturday, however, I'll be playing in my first softball game in like...decades...(wish me luck!) I love the physical activity. It makes me feel alive and clearheaded.

This year (as in 2011) I've taken out my kayak, just once... it's such a beast to lug around, but once it's in the water, its worth it. I reckon I'll be doing this a lot this summer as long as I have another set of hands who want to join me. I love seeing the Alligators sunning on the banks or swimming in the water. I'm always looking for them, but they mostly steer clear of humans, so they're hard to spot. I took my friend Hayley out, last weekend, and she got so upset when I confirmed there was probably gators where we were currently kayaking. Apparently, she, from Washington state, didn't get the memo that the big lizards are still alive and thriving in Florida... ha!

I have decided that my life will not be complete until I go out to England to visit Dixie next summer. So that's another 1 of my short term goals. This is us in New Orleans over Christmas break.

Dix- this next pic is for you. This, m'friend, is a drip castle. You could also say it's a forest of evergreens covered in snow.

I haven't been the beach as much as one would expect, living in Florida and all. Although, I did happen to make a trip 2 weekends ago, to St. George Island, where I crafted the above drip castle. The weather, although warm, was foggy and mystical looking (see pic below), so using my abundant common sense, I failed to apply sunblock. I thought "spf cloud" would block the harmful rays. Believe that a week and a half later, I am STILL peeling skin off my body. Gross. Mark my words, friends, I will never make the mistake again.

The fog looked a lot prettier in person, it was almost magical. And then around 3, the sky opened up, and that same ocean looked like this! Amazing!

Been thinking about this little boy a lot lately. So I'll throw a pic up of his precious face. I love this little man more than probably anybody else in the world. He is perfection. Miss you little man.

Speaking of people that I love. These 2 girlies deserve a shout out. Olivia and Zoe are 2 of the cutest girls I know here in Tally and I look forward to being witness to their lives. They're leaving me for the exotic intrigue of Utah...(ahem...cough) Good luck to them and their endeavors! Love you friends! xoxo

Another person whom I love is this man. He came to Orlando and did a Q&A for the single adults. I was simply inspired. I so appreciate and admire a person who manages to balance direct, guileless instruction with kindness. I strive to be such a person.

He spoke next to this sacred and beautiful building that I am hoping to get married in someday. Yes that is the Orlando temple.

Wasn't conference good last weekend? I love conference.... oh sigh... I just love it. I took lots of notes, but the biggest thing that I got, is cutting out the unimportant, uninspiring, and negative influences from my life. Furthermore, and likewise being unapologetic about it! Life is short, and it goes by so fast! I must follow the admonition of the Apostle Paul who says to seek after only the best things in life. And Prioritize!

Sacrifice means giving up good things for better things, not bad things for good things. Put more eloquently; Sacrifice is the surrender or destruction of something prized or desirable for the sake of something considered as having a higher or more pressing claim. I love it! It's so empowering to do hard things for the right reasons.

President Monson and all other speakers at conference this last weekend, I love you...

So, did I mention I've been painting a bit since I moved to Tally? I did 2 large pieces a few months ago, and have been waiting for some inspiration to finish my last one. I finally got to it, this weekend, while I listened to conference. It's my interpretation of the tree of life. The lighting in the garage make the colors look a little drab here, but I am pleased with how it turned out. I'd like to create a new painting every couple months.

In addition to my aforementioned goals, others include reading these books cover to cover:

Completing this series:

Begin reading:

And to take out my surf board and my long board and become mightily proficient. Yes. Mightily proficient.

a possibility. 3 actually.

2011-02-03T14:19:00.000-05:00

Last weekend, I went to Tampa to attend the Landmark Forum. It's a sort of self-improvement program for people who want to experience a better quality of life. (You can research it here if you wish.)

I want to share with you some of what I personally got out of it. Brace yourself for some honesty. It's almost painful for me to to post this.

I discovered that I have issues with authenticity.

[I'm curious. Are you surprised? I'm guessing you're probably not...]

It didn't really occur to me till this weekend, but I sort of energetically run around making sure I get the message across that my life is super awesome, hunky dorey, and I have not a care in the world, when I am actually drowning.

I imagine myself at a large and beautiful pool, surrounded by people I know. Everybody is soaking up the rays and peacefully enjoying one another's company. I am out there in the deep end, I have a cute bathing suit on and a trendy swim cap, of course, but also these weights on my ankles which are pulling me down. I am swallowing a lot of chlorinated water, while trying to breathe and tread water. If anybody looks my way in concern, I laugh and hold up a sign that says, "Don't mind me, I'm exercising!"

Ridiculous.

I guess, that's what I do. I pretend to be enjoying my life. I am concentrating so much of my efforts into making sure others believe I am enjoying myself, that in reality I am not b/c I'm never fully engaged in the moment. Furthermore, I have this perceived idea of how I think others want me to be, and so I take on that persona. As a result, my relationships suffer b/c, in order for me to keep it up, I have to maintain a safe distance with everybody. This limits me tremendously and leaves me unfulfilled. No matter where I am, I believe that I am an outsider, but I tell myself that it's ok, b/c at least I look like I'm fine.

The bottom line is that I'm so preoccupied with my idea of "looking good" that I am disengaged. Besides being completely unsatisfying, two ironic things about this exist. You can probably see right through my in-authenticity, number one, and number two, it doesn't actually look good anyhow.

What does this mean in specifics?... Well, I will tell you.

- I have relationships with men that I'm not actually in love with. (Anybody out there wondering why I'm still not married? Bingo.) There are various reasons, and so much more I could say on the matter, but I won't. Suffice it to say, that love has rarely been the driving force in my relationships.

-I have only dated 1 person that I was truly absolutely crazy into, but it ended quite abruptly b/c I couldn't be real with him.

-Years ago, in Idaho, I gave up my scholarship and a possible future performing to pursue something "more meaningful" [??] b/c I thought it made me look like an airhead with no ambition if I didn't.

- I went to college for Biology and Chemistry, which I had little interest in b/c it made me look smart.

- I nearly went into a profession (of dentistry) that I had zero passion for b/c it made me look capable.

-I kept all the rules b/c it made me look like a good girl.

-I haven't stuck with hardly anything, b/c I likely didn't start it for myself.

- I often don't listen when people are speaking b/c I'm anticipating the next thing that I'm going to say.

-I have been carrying on this charade for so long that I'm having trouble figuring out what it is I even want out of life.

And I believe the list could continue on indefinitely. I'm hopelessly flawed, and not in the charming way Jane Austin says it.

Despite myself, and all my efforts, I have a two friends that boldly called me out on my shenanigans. One did it on purpose and the other did it unwittingly, but they are both responsible for how I ended up here. (In total seriousness, I feel that I am an addict who just had an intervention).

There is some good news, in case you're wondering.

- The first thing is that my frame of reference in dealing with others has shifted significantly. I've immediately been experiencing increased love and compassion for people around me. Although I am feeling sort of down for obvious reasons, I am feeling generous and easy about giving other people positive energy. Normally, I walk through life quickly, busy in my head, aloof, and not noticing those around me too often. I'm deliberate about the words and affection I offer people. But now, I feel like I just want to look and smile to everybody who passes by me, and hug my friends.

- Secondly, I feel sort of relieved. I am giving myself the green light to be who I want to be. It's frankly exhausting to live in-authentically. If the truth is that people see through my act, and are judging me anyhow, I might as well be true to myself and stop trying so hard to impress people that I probably don't even like in the first place.

So, I am creating for myself a few possibilities of being.

1. I am creating for myself the possibility of being true to my word.

2. I am creating for myself the possibility of being full of love and acceptance.

3. I am creating for myself the possibility of being courageous.

I no longer want to be a person who justifies myself out of commitments with "valid" reasons (it's too hard, too inconvenient, too embarrassing) of why I won't [fill in the blank] grow and progress. I want incredible things to start happening. And they will, by my having integrity to what I declare.

The incredible things of which I speak.

- I am going to be committed to my dancing business and I am going to learn my business. It occurred to me last weekend that I have not been asking for help b/c I didn't want to appear incompetent. I'm going to tell you right now. I don't have a CLUE what I am doing here. I've never owned a business before, I didn't go to school for business. I have only been lucky so far, but now it's time to get real. I have a lot to learn. I am getting a coach, I am going to start asking questions and involving those around me so that my business is as successful as it can possibly be.

- I am going to have a real, intimate, and meaningful relationship with a man that I am absolutely butt crazy in love with. I am not going to settle for less ever again b/c it's convenient or b/c I'm concerned with other people's opinions. He is going to be my best friend. He is going to know me b/c I am not going to withhold anything. He is going to know that I love him b/c I am going to tell him and show him.

- I am going to be complete with my family. I love them, and we are what we have. I am going to call each of them once a week, and take the sacrifices needed to get my butt on a plane to see them more than once a year.

- I am going to magnify my church callings. I am going to spend 30 minutes to an hour each day in deliberate study and preparation for my lessons, reading my scriptures and pondering ways to serve my neighbors (especially my visiting teach-ees).

Amen and good day.

Public Announcement

2011-01-10T16:07:00.000-05:00

So, the other day, one of my younger-ish friends, (who I adore) during a game of ultimate Frisbee, turned to me and said,

"You know Jessica, I can totally see why O. and Z. love to hang out with you. I used to love to hang out with this girl who was much older than me too, and it made me feel really cool." ...

Apparently, I responded something like this... crooked half smile....... silence.............?............... "oh!............ yeah!...... me too!"..............silence...........crooked half smile.........averting eyes......then running away...................
See, we were playing a game, so it was socially acceptable for me to run away at that moment..., but then I came back, b/c I was guarding her. Before I fled the scene, I suppose she sensed that perhaps she offended me, so she proceeded to tell me that she meant it as a compliment and hoped she hadn't hurt my feelings by *ahem* calling me old.... ?

I wasn't offended. I was surprised-turned speechless due to my inability to run and think at the same time.

It gave me pause though....
I am 28 now.... weird.
Wait.... am I old?
No! I'm not ollld.... I'm just... me.
But... is it weird that I love to hang out with a couple girls that are 8-10 years younger than me?
No! They're awesome! Besides. I enjoy keeping the company of people of all ages. It keeps things interesting.

I'm pretty sure that is what my friend was trying to say. She can see that I am super awesome b/c I can hang out with younger girls due to my own youthful energy and vibrancy. ;)

But I would still like to make a public announcement.

If you want to make comments to me about my age, marital status, bmi, car, fingernail polish, hair style, obsession with personality tests or any other Jessica-esque quality that I possess- It's alright. I enjoy the attention! And don't worry, I won't get offended either. I'm pretty sure taking offense gives you wrinkles. However, I can't promise that I won't over-analyze the situation though, just to check in and make sure that I'm still a contributing member of society....

Anywhooooo....

Oh yeah. So, I turned 28 yesterday! All I cared about was cake- Did I get some? Yes I did, and my friends even made it for me! Nice!
Aaaand I'm pretty sure Facebook was invented to boost my self-esteem. I loved the birthday wishes on there. I felt the love fo sho. ThankshGUyzh!

(In case you're wondering what happened to the masquerade plans- we did not have a masquerade party, there were just too many conflicting elements (such as ward activities and missionary going away parties) that caused us to merely postpone it till maybe next month. Stay tuned for masked awesome-ness coming to you in the near future.)

Here are some completely age appropriate photos of me from last month- Y'know- Doing my thang with my bf Dixie, who also happens to be 28.

Christmas in Louisiana

2010-12-29T13:56:00.000-05:00

This is Dixie, Ayden and Vera. Ayden has the biggest heart of any little boy I've ever met. He loves kissing his cousin Vera and little sister and hanging out with his "aunt" Jessica. I am going to miss this kiddo.

This is Stacy, Dixie's sister. She is pretty rad. Her and her husband Josh were hostesses for Christmas and were way awesome about me crashing in on all the fun. I love their family like my own.

Pawpaw Chuck!

These two little girlies make me want to have babies. They are soooo sweet.

Seeesters Stacy and Dixie

This is Stacy's husband Josh, with Vera and Pawpaw. I love this picture. Vera is so happy!

Just arrived to New Orleans for some site seeing and shopping.

Ian, funny kid. He wouldn't take these sunglasses off for anything. I think it was like one of those "Big Daddy" things where he's protected from strangers with em on. Ian cracked me up the whole trip. He has the face and demeanor and middle name sake of his pawpaw Chuck, and it's super cute.

So you know how some cities have those silver statue looking dudes that pose very still and if you give him a dollar they'll do something crazy or unexpected? Yeah. This wasn't one of those kind of moments. He was really just a statue. This uber lame dude in the yellow was the "artist"....Scam artist....

Some of the fam walking around

This is a muffalata... it's something you gotta try when in New Orleans. Preee good.

French quarter

Bras.

Bourbon Street

This voodoo doll store was awesome. I loved the colors and creativity. Dixie and I got each other little voodoo keychain dolls. Hers had a mohawk and mine had a tutu.

Jamie Hayes is a known local artist who creates bright and fun pieces that I dig.

This keyboard smile is sort of his token signature.


Frolf! Markus on the left is Dixie's husband and Josh on the right is Stacy's. These guys are a lot of fun to be around, as you can see.

gift wrapping

Vera enjoying the paper as much as the gifts :)

Ayden got this awesome 4D shark model that I loved just as much as he did. Ayden and I both share an affinity for sharks, which I think is sort of unusual as most people prefer dolphins or whatever. Anyway, we watched a lot of YouTube shark videos and stuff together. T'was fun.

Cute as a button

Ian waiting for the fun to begin. Hilarious.

Dixie and Afton. Afton has the cutest voice. She jibberjabbers constantly and I love it. She is such a cool kid. It's strange that she's only 7 months older than Vera. She has like this old soul and you almost forget she's a baby. I love that little girl!

Shark tooth. You can hardly see it, and I'm not sure why he's frowing...buuut he was pretty excited about it. This must be his earnest look. haha

Impromptu karaoke. This is Ms Lorna singing with Vera and Josh

Stacy, Dixie, Charlie, Aunt Videt, and uncle David singing Christmas songs.

The family

Hello. It's me. Just keeping my promise.

2010-12-19T19:29:00.000-05:00

Today was a great Sunday. The majority of the single's ward was absent for the holidays so our congregation was small. I loved it. The spirit in our ward is always strong, but for some reason it seemed extra special and intimate this day. Yay. :)

I wore blue suede heels to match my blue fingernails. It made me feel coool. I also wore these pink lace fingerless gloves that pretty much rocked my world.

From this angle it looks like I was totally punk rocked out for church...and no worries, mom, I wasn't! I had a very classy Anne Taylor dress on, so the blue nails and fingerless gloves were just fun accessories.

Anyways...moving on....

I am driving to Louisiana tomorrow to see one of my dearest friends, Dixie Mann who is in from England + her hubs + darling offspring + rest of the Holloway clan, which is pretty much my extended family, so I'm quite excited. I've never been to La... here I come Nawlins + Red Stick! ... K, they don't actually call Baton Rouge that...

Currently....In the meantime, I am [not] packing and laying in bed, doing one of my fave past times. Downloading music and rocking out and stumbling.

Ever heard of Rusted Root?.... They're awes.

Alert. I'm feeling throat-ish. I need to not get sick on this trip. That would be bad for the babies that I intend on snuggling the entire time.

so...
This is what I'm thinking for the future.
I'm getting certified to dive and learning surf (for reals this time). This coming Spring/Summer is going to be epic. And I don't use that word lightly.
Somehow I'm going to try and make it to a Tony Robbins seminar that is happening in Ft. Lauderdale in March.
I am going to continue to run and perhaps sign up for a race (yikes!)

Why am I looking so far into the future? ...

Let's talk about what is most pressing- My birthday party! In like 3 weeks!
OH M'GSH. It is going to be. the! BEST! It's going to be a suuuuper fancy masquerade. AH!

Here's my inspiration. I can't decide which girl I'm going to channel. Probably the one on the left.

And.
I like this picture.

I'm happiest when I'm dancing.
The end.

This is your life. Travel Often.

2010-12-15T12:19:00.000-05:00

The Book Thief.

2010-12-13T21:35:00.001-05:00

The last book that I read that had such a touching impact on me as this, The Book Thief, was the Kite Runner... which makes me think of Memoirs of a Geisha too. (Note how all 3 of these involve war in the plot) I don't know why I am drawn in so tightly to books that depress me for hours after I finish the last page. I'm so attracted to the melancholy! ... Not all the time, but they seem to stay with me far longer than books that make me laugh. I love tragedy and suffering. I guess it's b/c I love it when the human spirit prevails maintaining hope and love. There is probably some psychological suggestion that a therapist can offer me as well...
Anywho. This book is brill. I don't like to let myself cry b/c I have sensitive skin, you know...and it's not good for my complexion. I couldn't help myself this time; tears flowed. If you like this sort of thing too, give this book a read.

question.

2010-12-12T19:24:00.000-05:00

If you call a person and they pick up, but they don't actually answer the phone, and you think they actually meant to send you to voicemail b/c you can hear them talking to other people in the room, what level of creepy is it if you just stay on the line and listen in...?
I totally just spied on somebody-for like five minutes. And I feel super guilty...even though nothing embarrassing was said... I think I feel guilty b/c I was hoping that something embarrassing would be said....ha
I think this is a losery moment for me.
This is real life.

Jump for my love. (this title in no way reflects the contents of this post.)

2010-12-10T14:23:00.000-05:00

My blogging has slowed to practically a halt. Ever since I moved to Tally I've been 98% uninspired. I don't know why.

It's not that my life is less exciting. It's not that I have less things to say. (It could be that I almost never remember to take pictures.) I just haven't felt compelled to share. Sorry. I know you're totally broken up about it.

Well. Anywho.

So a couple of you actually are broken up about it, and tis the season for giving, so I'm going to return to the blogging sphere and put myself out there for you. Nice, eh?

And... wow, look at the time, it's 2:16 and I have to get going b/c I am teaching a class at 3. Dang. I actually had something to say. I really did this time.

But don't worry. This is my post to jump start my posting again. I promise. From now on, it won't be a month between entries. I'm going to be a blogging monster.

I have stuff I plan to put out there....Just wait.
Like how I'm totally craftastic these days. How I discovered a seriously rad vintage shop here that rivals all vintage shops in Richmond VA. How I love my calling. How horseback riding is hazardous to my health and a risk to my business, but I won't let it stop me. How my holidays are going to be spent. How I'm going to totally go fishing soon and I anticipate it changing my life... and how my turning 28 next month is going to mark the coolest year of my life; Basically adventures in my personal wonderland.... OH AND- how FLORIDA is SOOO not warm in the winter and I'm seriously beyond disappointed.... Honestly and truly, whoever misinformed me is in big trouble mister.

Stay tuned.

Blonde or brunette?

2010-11-08T12:00:00.000-05:00

Just kidding...there is no way I'd ever go blond. My curly hair would fall out...
The top pics are a couple from my friend Marianne's wedding in Utah last month. The bottom pics are from Halloween... I am sick in bed and don't feel like elaborating... the end.

wha wha!

2010-09-25T22:26:00.000-04:00

It's ~~10pm~~ 10:21pm...Saturday night.
I'm alone...for the first time in a while, it seems.
I'm no stranger to alone time...right? I spend most of my days solitary. It's the nature of the beast, I mean, that is, what I do... I teach ballet to preschoolers, so I'm not technically alone, but I might as well be. Anyway. For some reason I actually feel alone. Right now. But I don't mind it.

What am I jabbering about?

I'm exhausted!

I haven't been to bed before 2 am in weeks. Literally. Like 2 weeks. Every night I stay up to some crazy hour, sometimes even 5 am a few times. Yes, believe it. I've turned into a regular night owl.

I have my reasons.

Oh my gosh, I freaking love my life....

I went to my first REAL life college football game today. I'm sorry, but it was huge and awesome and I loved it. Where has college football been all my life? (Parents?) Yeah, true, I was a Bangle dancer for ISU and did, in fact, cheer at football games for one semester, before I decided I wanted to live on the East coast, but that so did not even count..........

..........I've met an abundance of new people, lately. They are all good, and fascinating. I feel blessed. I feel like I have a hundred thousand friends.... When, in reality, they probably don't even remember my name... ha! Oh well! (Wait a minute, didn't I just say I've been spending my days alone? That doesn't make any sense. Scratch that first paragraph. I contradict myself sometimes. You probably already knew that.)

I bought a new t-shirt for myself today and it was such a treat.

I had a toasted PB&J and an apple for dinner.

I'm going to bed now.

I have a talk in church tomorrow.

an analogy

2010-09-10T16:32:00.000-04:00

I get asked a lot these days where I am from. My inclination is to say Virginia. I was born and raised in Idaho, yes. But I am a Richmonder. My shaping, & formidable years were spent in the West End, the Fan, Shocko Bottom, Short Pump, VCU campus and the James River. I became the woman I am today b/c of Richmond. I love that place. I "grew up" there. I was comfortable and happy there.

It broke my heart in pieces to leave. I don't think I ever really wanted to leave, but I had to. When I decided to embrace that reality, it was like God picked me up and gently placed me back down in another spot, exactly where He wanted me. It seemed as if I didn't have a choice in the matter. If you want to know the truth, I went a little bit kicking and screaming, even though it was my bright idea after all (or was it my idea?).

There is an image in my mind that I'd like to illustrate. It goes something like this. I'm sitting on a yellow chair. I love the chair. It's simple and wooden and sturdy. It has this worn groove in the seat that fits me just right. The paint is bright and cheerful. I like how my body fits into the back of the chair. I sit contentedly in it, looking on.

I watch as a whirlwind approaches. It's full of glitter, Pocahontas leaves, and magic, dancing and swirling right in front of me, in the shape of a small cyclone. It comes within arms length and suggests for me to step inside it and allow it to sweep me away.

I reach down and feel the chair with my hands. It's smooth and solid. It's comforting. I'm attached. I know if I stand up and walk into the wind I risk losing the chair, but I want that pretty glitter all over me and the potential adventures that the wind offers me. I hesitate, but I stand. I turn around and look at the chair. It occurs to me to pick the chair up and step into the whirlwind with it, so I do. However, within moments, the chair is pulled from my grip. I can't hold on to it and fly at the same time.

I experience great remorse and some regret. As I am pulled through the air, I think about the past and wish I hadn't put my feet on that chair so much. I wonder about the future and if somebody else will find my chair. Will they appreciate it and love it as I did? I miss that chair terribly and mourn its absence. For a moment, I think my loss is greater than I can bear. But then the wind starts to settle.

I realize am standing in the middle of a field of green and surrounded by more beauty and warmth than I imagined was possible. I look up and see people and things drift down from the sky attached to white parachutes. They all land in spots around me. They're gifts from heaven. I consider that it is a miracle.

I marvel at my Heavenly Father's love for me.

I walk. And then I run.

Time passes and then I smile. And then I laugh. I end up laughing and smiling as much as I ever did when I used to sit in that chair. I consider that maybe I might even be happier than when I was sitting in that chair.

I begin to think about the chair less. I don't forget about it, though. I could never forget such a beautiful thing. I silently send out my love and prayers daily to the chair that used to be mine and mean so much to me.

I look around at my gifts that were graciously delivered to me in this new place. My heart beats hard, and my gratitude overflows.

Just look at them.

Scotty came to town!

2010-08-27T08:35:00.000-04:00

When I first moved to VA, all those years ago, when I was a young & naive version of myself, Scott was one of the first people I met. Scotty and I became fast friends for two years before he moved. He was a rising 3rd year dental student and I was fascinated with why such a smart & cool guy would ever want to dig inside people's mouths the rest of his life! He schooled me on the benefits of dentistry as a profession, and his influence actually encouraged me to pursue it myself. We all know how my fickle nature caused me to change my mind in the end. However, had I never pursued that path I would have never gotten the degree I did, nor met some of the most influential people and best friends of my life. I have Scotty boy to thank for that.

So, Scott is a dentist for the army now and has traveled the world! He has been stationed in South Carolina, Korea, Iraq, DC, and now Texas. On his drive from DC to his Texas the other day, he made a pit stop to visit lil ole me in Florida! YAY! Scotty and I see each other about once a year, but every time we do, we picked up right where we left off. I love that guy!

So, I have two purposes for this post. Who knows ~~anybody~~ pretty girls in the Austin, Texas area? Hook him up!

Scott likes traveling, dogs, delicious food, the outdoors. He's tall, very handsome, and speaks Portuguese fluently. He's also one of the nicest guys you'll ever meet in your life, should you get the blessed opportunity.

Secondly, check out this new restaurant that we had brunch at. The CrepeVine! Awesome!

I love you Scotty! I hope you enjoy Texas!

video?

2010-08-19T17:01:00.002-04:00

I thought I posted a video with my last post. guess not.
Oh well. Too bad.
I'm too tired to mess with it now.
Maybe later.

weekend getaway.

2010-08-19T17:00:00.001-04:00

The last 3 days have been magical. I am tempted to say that they've been the best 3 days of my Florida adventure thus far. However, that might diminish all my other awesome days that I've had... so I won't exaggerate. Suffice it to say, I am turning into one of those annoying facebook people whose status is often, "I AM SO HAPPY, MY LIFE RULES!!!"... Don't you hate those people? or... rather, do you even believe those people?... I surely don't. So, before I start going into how outrageously tubular my last few days have been, I'll offer that I'm still broke and missing Richmond like crazy. There.

Remember how I work pt time at Southwood Golf Club?... Here's a video of me awkwardly jibberjabbering while on bev cart duty there. I kind of loathe watching myself on video/hearing myself talk... I mean, how many times do I need to say "awesome" in a conversation?... However, b/c I know how some of you miss seeing my face... this is my gift to you. You're welcome.
mm k.

This is a tree, under which I was sitting during my video. I want to show you the Spanish moss. This magical fauna hangs from the Life Oaks here in Tallahassee, for which this place is known. And it's maybe, maybe my favorite thing. These trees are gigantic. I lived in Richmond, so I'm no stranger to trees, but these Live Oaks are special. These trees have souls, like in the Disney movie Pocahontas. You look at them and believe they're looking back, with their hair blowing in the wind. And they're saying stuff like...."Be strong Jessica...be steady..." You know, junk like that.

True story: Today on my (looong, solitary, 5 hour) way home, as I was approaching the county limits. I didn't realize the the highway would actually turn into a road I already knew. As I was considering my lack of direction, I recognized a tree. Yes. I looked over to the side of the road, which lacked any man-made landmarks, and I thought, "I like that tree. Wait. I know that tree. Wait, I know exactly where I am." And I totally did.

I share this story, b/c I wonder if perhaps in another life I was a tree? What other logical reason could I offer for being so... obsessed?

ANYwho..................

Hi. Moving on.
First thing the next morning. I was off to Daytona. All you haters out there who told me Daytona was trashy and not the "nicest beach" in Florida, can go fly a kite. There is a clear reason that Daytona is considered the most famous beach in the world. It was BEEautiful. The sand was like powdered sugar. The water was warm, crystal clear and offered me regular 4 feet waves to body surf in. The weather was perfection. And I'll add that the staff at my condo were top notch. I spent two days rotating from beach to pool to hot tub to shower and back again with a fresh beach towel whenever I wanted it. Can you say, AWESOME?

These are literally the only pictures I took. I arrived, went directly to the balcony, took 3 pictures, turned around took one picture of the common area put all my stuff down, sprinted to the pool then played on the beach for the next 2 days solid. I simply couldn't be bothered with a camera.

OK. I did take one more pic. This was taken from my iphone, as I was laying in bed the first morning. I was reading a mag, and I looked over at the breakfast I was eating and thought, "This moment is awesome." Instead of turning the camera around and taking a picture of my pillow-creased face, I took one of my bacon. I often eat in my bed, while reading...but never with the ocean just outside my door. Food tastes better at the beach.

The evening of my last day in Daytona Nate''s father Paul, his wife Nancy, Nate' and I went to a light house. It was neat-o.

The next day (yesterday) I woke up and drove 2.5 hours to Tampa to see my friend Beth. Beth and I met years ago at VCU in Chem 101. I remember very distinctly the first time I saw her. I thought, "That girl, is SO pretty, and such a great dresser. and what a fabulous bag...!"... So, I told her so, and we became instant friends. Over the years, our educations have taken us in different places, but we've kept in touch, and I'm so glad. She is such a gem. She was in Tampa vising her brother Mark who lives there. I couldn't pass up an opportunity to see her while she was so close!

Can you see the gator?

See the other gator?

Now. Some of you may be wondering, "Does Jess wear that dress every single day?" And my answer to that is, Yes. Nearly every day.

complaints

2010-08-10T12:26:00.001-04:00

I've been getting complaints that I never blog anymore.
And when I do, I get complaints that I'm not posting pictures...

Well, I can't really do much about the pictures situation b/c I haven't been taking any.

But here's another update.

It's been super hot here in the Sunshine State, so the horseback riding lessons have slowed to about once a week. That's frustrating b/c when I do get on Drew, it's like the first time all over again and I'm a bumbling fool. Nanny (Nate''s step mother) has been encouraging me to invite some of the boys I'm dating to come ride horses with me as an activity. I'm thinking, NO WAY. There is no way I'm letting any man I am interested in watch me bounce around on the back of a horse and periodically scream out in fear when the horse falters. NOT happening... Paul says I'm improving. I look forward to the day when it feels natural and my body just moves with the horse instead of me having to deliberately tell my legs and back and arms what to do.

My biz officially starts next month, i.e. that's when the children start their classes. My goal was to get 10 schools to sign on with me and happily, I have surpassed that. It's too early to celebrate, though, I am still waiting to see how many students actually sign up. I am hoping for 80 students at least. Pray for my success :)

In the meantime, I have like 4 part time jobs for summer cash. I regularly clean 2 families' houses and sometimes I get a phone call to clean others. I babysit. I also tend for a 90 year old Mexican woman. I happen to be doing that at the moment. I sit in a chair next to her and we try to communicate with each other in her broken English and my broken Spanish. It's an interesting time. Sometimes to mix things up I'll give her a pedicure and a foot rub. Right now she's choking down some foul smelling chicken from Wendy's that her daughter in-law picked up. She needs her protein and apparently she hates what she's been given. I don't blame her.

I'm also working at a golf club. It's boring. The end.

See! This is why I haven't been blogging. The only stuff that I have to share is too boring and the other stuff is too personal. I know some of you want to know what's going on in my dating life. There isn't anything to tell, not really. I am dating and I am happy.

I am going to the beach for four days this weekend, with Nate''s family. I'm looking forward to that. I'll take pictures and report back.

ok. Fine. Here are some pictures that I've taken from my iphone.

A gator.

A baby gator.

Duckies that get eaten by the gator. Sad but true. (I came back to see the ducks and there were only 2 left)

When it rains, it pours.

My flooding garage. No harm done.

My darling little friend. Nate''s niece.

A disgusting neighbor of mine.

Ima be.

2010-07-20T17:48:00.000-04:00

happy.
creative.
celebrative.
patient.
real.

Balance.

2010-07-16T14:40:00.002-04:00

Back when I was in school, I used to cringe when people asked me what I liked to do for fun.

What are my hobbies? ... You mean, besides reading text books and preparing for tests?...

Oh, ok. Um. There's eating and sleeping…. That’s two….On Sundays I go to church. And a few times a week I work out…maybe…. Did I mention eating? I love to eat. Wait, I did mention that already, didn’t I?.... Preeeettty boring…

Lately, I’ve been thinking to myself. “Hey! I want somebody to ask me what I do for fun. I am interesting now. I have something I could say!”

Go ahead.

Ask me what I do for fun.

Ok, I’ll just tell you.

*deep breath, cross legs, lean forward, hands start motioning a mile a minute. Go*

So, recently, I took up horseback riding lessons. I love it. I’m learning how to post. For those of you who don’t know, that’s when you stand up in your stirrups and then sit back down as the horse trots. Today we went up to a lope. I was terrified, but it was exhilarating. I almost cried. Again. These horses, they have this weird emotional effect on me! Anyway, also today, my trainer, Paul, put me in an English saddle instead of my normal western, to see how I took to it. I liked it better. Although the horn on the Western is nice to grab a hold of in times of fear, it gets in my way.

From now on, I will be riding Drew on the English saddle. I need to start saving up for my very own riding boots.

2. I am working on my first painting as an adult. I pretty much did the whole thing in one day, but I’m unhappy with the way it turned out. It's 3 birds in flight. I am going to continue to work on it until I am satisfied. I guess after a decade of nonuse, my drawing and painting abilities have decreased quite a bit. Last night before bed, I imagined paintings that I want to begin work on. I have plans for Christmas gifts this year.

I paint now. I'm creative. I'm cool.

4. I picked up the piano again after years of absence. My mother will be pleased do know that she was right. All those years ago, when I complained about practicing, she knew someday I’d appreciate it. I have a piano to play over at Paul’s house. Paul is my horse riding instructor, and also happens to be my roommate Nate’’s biological padre. He is maybe one of the coolest men I’ve ever met.

5. I am actively reading my scriptures now. I know that for many of you that has been a habit you’ve been in since seminary. Unfortunately, I have never been in that habit. But now I am. And I do it for fun.

6. I’ll soon be taking my dogs for walks and training them, as soon as I have them. Yay!

I’ve been working a lot still, but I feel like for the first time in my life, I am developing balance. Up until now, balance has not been a part of my vocabulary nor my life.

As I’m writing this I’m thinking to myself. I’m writing this to mostly friends of mine who are young mothers. I know you have little time to yourself these days b/c it is wrapped up in your babies. I know that you’d never trade your kids for anything in the world; they are what life is all about! But having sufficient time to yourself is limited. You have to be sufficient in keeping balance. Is that hard? Do you look back to before the time you got married and think, "I'm glad I did that, b/c I'd never have time for it now", or "I wish I had done this or that, b/c now I'm too busy with little peanut." ...?

I’m a person who has nev-er had balance in my life. I tend to be sort of extreme. In high school, my life revolved around dance. I focused on shockingly little else. A lot of girls also managed to have boyfriends, and went to parties, and were involved in numbers of other sports, and were valedictorians. Not me. Dance. Eat. Sleep. Repeat. (To be fair, I was devoted to more than one type of dance). What's sort of ironic about it is I didn't even care all that much about dance. It's just, that's what I did. I was good at it, I enjoyed it to a moderate degree, and so I gave it all my attention.

In college, books and school were my life. The end. As I mentioned, before I had zero hobbies. I often even forgot to eat during that time. It’s true.

And let’s be honest, all last year when I was dating Clint, and we were in the same city he was my life and nothing much else mattered. My life was very unbalanced.

My natural tendency is to pick one thing and throw 100% of my energy into it. Everything else suffers.

I reckon that there’s a good reason why I haven’t gotten married and had children just yet. Heavenly father knows that if I had, too early in life, all else would have fallen by the wayside. Later on down the line I might have regretted not doing "this", or doing "that" first. OR worse is that I would have wanted to continue to do school or start something else in the meantime, and I would have been so obsessed with it that my family would have suffered.

I have not been ready. I still have stuff to accomplish first, and stuff to learn. Not the least of which is balance. I’m learning how to juggle many important things all at once; giving each thing it’s appropriate attention. Emphasis on appropriate. I think the best mothers are ones who know how to do that. Someday, I think, I'm going to be a great mother.

p.s. pictures will come from horseback riding when I find my camera charger, or buy a new one.

Tallahassee.

2010-07-14T21:34:00.003-04:00

Have you ever meant to call a someone, but put it off? And then you kept putting it off b/c then it seemed embarrassing that you waited so long to call? And then you put it off too long that contacting them now just seemed sorta...almost pointless?

I don't think I ever do that sort of thing...

Ugh my blog....ugh... I'm just so behind. Where do I even START?... I know you have ... these...EXPECTATIONS...of my move...and all...

Alriiiiighty. So here's a recap.
In Richmond, after I graduated college, a year ago I started working for Dancing Little Stars. I loved it.

I had the opportunity presented to me to buy a DLS franchise and take it somewhere of my choosing.
I considered it, but mostly dismissed it. I mean, I had a serious boyfriend of over a year and I wanted to stay in Richmond at least for another year. I thought I was going to go to grad school.

Buuuut. The as time went on, Richmond, as much as I seriously, seriously loved that city (*tear!!!), was feeling less right. I knew it was time to go. I felt my time there was up. I felt the itch; That oh-so-familiar itch, to pick it up and charge ahead on a new adventure...

So, long story short, I bought that DLS franchise and chose Tallahassee, Florida as my next place of residency. Why FLA? Let's just say it was another opportunity that fell in my lap.

Backing up.
Let me tell you a little something about myself that you might find amusing. As you probably already know, I'm sort of a go-getter, but not in the traditional sense. I wouldn't describe myself as a workaholic. I don't think anybody would. If there is a couch and a book/movie to be read/watched, I will be there. I totally get 9 hours of sleep per night, and still try to take a nap during the day. I am as lazy as I can get away with being. However, when I want something. I won't quit until it's mine. A friend of mine about 4-5 years ago nicknamed me "Force-it", for that reason. I will force things open/closed/in/out/whatever. If I feel an uncomfortable conversation needs to be had, I will make it happen. If I want to go to school on the east coast. I will do it, no matter the amount of student loans. If I want to go to Spain...twice...you get the idea. I am actually not proud of this quality. In fact, I am moderately embarrassed by it. It's not a flattering characteristic... it certainly gets me in trouble.

A few years ago I tried to force some things out of my life, like refined sugar and meat. Like seriously? So, I can be extreme. Fortunately, I often recognize the foible of my ways and remedy it. I mean, did I honestly think I could live without red velvet cupcakes and steak the rest of my mortal days?... Life is short guys.

I guess, I am just trying to find my way. This is how I go about it. Does anybody out there find this endearing, instead of obnoxious?.... Anybody?

I tell you this b/c what is truly fascinating is what happens when I'm beat and I sit still for a minute. When I stop being force-it, worrying and being borderline crazy. Things literally fall from the sky into my lap. One example, the jobs I've had over the years. I have applied for many jobs in my day. But every single one that I've actually held (painter, news station camera girl, tutor, nail technician, nanny/babysitter, aupair, orthodontist assistant, ballet teacher) were all handed to me. Half I barely applied for, and the others were given to me.

And it's not just part time jobs. The absolute best opportunities in my life are ones that simply present themselves to me, and that I just go with. (Don't misunderstand, maintenance and work still required)

So with this knowledge, why am I not more easy going and chill?...

My biggest trial in life is being patient and letting things be. While we're on the subject, let me state, that this happens to be the specific trial in my life, right now. Right this very moment.
In no less that 3 areas of my life, I am having to patiently let things unfold naturally, as Heavenly Father sees fit, while I pray like my life depends on it, and work my tail off. This is not the purpose of life, yes?

I am learning.

Guess what the first big lesson my Tally life has taught me?

That I don't know diddly.

Remember when we were like 19, and we thought we knew ev.er.y.thing.? I mean, I did. I knew what life was all about! I knew when I was going to get married, and when and how many children I'd have and their names. I knew what was right and what was wrong; who was good and who was bad.

Over the years, I've recognized that I actually have a thing or two to learn about real life.

But wow. These past few weeks have truly shown me, in a way like never before, that I don't know jack. I don't know anything about love. I don't know anything about life. I don't know much about anything. I am just a child, faking my way.

Humility. Oh, it's a fun place to be.

I want to pause and give myself some credit, and say that I do, in fact, know some stuff. But let's not. Let's not jinx anything just today, ok?

I can joke about it now, but dang. It's been a tearful, emotional few weeks. Thank goodness for trials, right? As hard as they are, and as much as you want to slit your wrists in the meantime (ok just joking, not that bad), if you are paying attention, they give you perspective and wisdom. That's the good part of tribulation, I suppose.

I'm in a good place, and sort of starting from scratch. I am literally starting my life over at 27 years old! It's kind of cool. Sometimes I tell myself that I'm pretty bad A. (sorry...it gets me through)

I'm working for myself. Dancing Little Stars doesn't start up till the fall, but there is still plenty of work to be done. Believe that being your own boss totally has it's perks. I was always meant to work for myself. I'm all about the flexible schedule, the self motivation...etc...etc... However, it is hard work too. When you wake up in your own office and don't have anybody to dress up for, it's mighty tempting to take all day doing nothing.

I am cleaning houses for extra cash. It's humbling, backbreaking work. I recommend it for anybody.

I got another extra job working at a golf club. I start next week. I'm hoping to meet lots of interesting people with connections. And improve upon my golf game. Yeah baby.

I also got another job as a tutor. Hey, I have bills to pay and who knows how the biz is going to fair?

The BEST thing is that I am taking horseback riding two mornings a week. Horses are the most therapeutic animals. When I am on the back of a horse, I am focused and exhilarated. I almost cried on mine today... b/c I was so happy. I know. Freak.

I played the piano today for the first time in years. I decided I'm going to play once a week now.

I am doing the P90X program. I'll admit, my body is looking pretty smoking these days. Hey, whatever. You have husbands and babies. Let me have my abs.

I am adopting 2 orphan doggies next week. Their names are Bubba and Birdy... looking forward to some cuddly companionship.

I am now on my second season of Alias on my laptop b/c I don't own a television.

I am reading my scriptures everyday, and quite enjoying it! I am learning about things that I haven't learned about in years...or ever!

Life is beautiful.

I didn't want to leave you without any pictures...but I lost my camera charger, so all I have are old photos and ones from my iphone. Here's a picture from last summer though. Don't I look happy? I was.

This is my most recent photo of Nate' and I together. This girl and I have been through a lot, man. She is such a great friend. I'm so glad I have her to share my Tallahassee experience with.

Me at Wakulla Springs in FLA, first week here. This is where they filmed the old, original Tarzan movie, and The Creature From the Black Lagoon.

...

2010-06-30T14:41:00.002-04:00

Bikram

2010-06-12T08:11:00.001-04:00

I've found a new obsession: Bikram Yoga. Ever heard of it? How about "hot" yoga? Same thing.
(Well, sort of, actually. There are hot yogas that aren't of the Bikram persuasion.) Anyways. I've been practicing yoga for years, and I love it. I am of the belief that yoga heals the body of its ailments through breathing exercises and inversion poses. In my opinion, everybody can benefit and should practice yoga, even children.

As for me, I have scar tissue in my neck that, if ignored, along with stress, creates golf ball sized knots in my neck that spread down my back. It makes for some serious pain and headaches. However, yoga helps me manage it, along with providing relaxation, and feeling good.

So, I've been hearing a lot of good things about this "hot" yoga. Bikram, specifically, is a series of 26 yoga poses each one twice, and in the exact same order every time. It takes 90 minutes and is carried out in a room heated to 105 degrees with 40% humidity. The idea is that your muscles are more apt to do what you need/want them to, PLUS you sweat out all your toxins.

The boyfriend and I tried it out Monday. It was basically 90 minutes of torture. I kid you not. When the instructor finally said that the class was over, I literally cried. Tears. But then I stopped b/c I didn't want to embarrass myself. I kind of want to say that I hated it. I was so HOT and uncomfortable and SOAKING wet. I might as well have jumped in the bathtub with my clothes on. That's how wet I (everybody) was. My heart was beating in protest the entire time, and I was exhausted.

I was back in 2 days. And the day after that. And I'm going again in an hour.

I like to torture myself.

Saturday

2010-05-30T09:12:00.000-04:00

You know when a character on T.V. is a psychologist or something and attempts to hypnotize a patient? They tell them to imagine a place that they feel most happy and relaxed and at peace?

This is my place.

oh. and here too.

and this couldn't hurt.

(p.s. have you been to Brookstone lately and tried this thing? It's ridiculous how awesome/effective it is. It's a hundred dollars and as soon as I move to Tallahassee, it's going to be my numero uno purchase. I'm pretty sure my dad could use one of these as well.)

a thought.

2010-05-26T12:28:00.001-04:00

OK. So I know I've been uber depress-fest lately... Look, I'm sorry!

I almost can't help it. If get a thought in my head, practically any idea AT ALL, it will spin, and toil, and run around my brain, and then sit impatiently on the ledge, until I let it out. It's a rule. Furthermore, if I do not express the idea in the right words and adequately, under my own arbitrary standard, then I have to repeat myself and try out different ways of saying it, until I'm satisfied.

I've come to realize that this can be a problem.

It can be a problem for my own sanity. And it can be a problem for the sanity of my l.o.s (loved ones) who suffer through my jibber jabbering.

Last night, after putting my dearest l.o. through one of my problem solving & (I thought) meaningful conversations about ... problems and solving them, something came to my attention.

You know how in church we're taught to control our thoughts?- sing a hymn, count down from 1000 by 3's, or whatever? In my naivity, I have always sort of assumed that this was in reference to pornographic thoughts, and maybe hateful thoughts. All other ideas in my mind being 100% relevant and imperative. Period. Why else would they be there?! It has never truly occurred to me that thoughts of negativity could be lies coming from the adversary, and were to be combated not entertained. (You knew this, right?)

Moreover, I have always treated negative/downer thoughts (read: doubt, fear, anger, hurt, frustration) as indicators that I'm doing something wrong. That I am wrong... "STOP/CHANGE whatever it is you're doing, NOW! Analyzation and problem-solvation are in order!" Basically. (Can you imagine my further frustration/confusion?) It seemed ludicrous ignore such thoughts or *gasp*- let them GO.

Well, now, I'm hoping to change my tune. In the face of major change, I am witnessing some of my unflattering tendencies come to the forefront and it doesn't suit. I want to be the best person I can be. I recognize this as something that I can do better.

Doubt and fear are useless emotions. I can completely throw them out. If I know something to be right and true, I can charge forward with faith and cheer. I don't need reassurance from an outside source. I know it in my heart already.

Anger, hurt and frustration, with a little more thought, can be turned into understanding, selflessness, and love... And PATIENCE!!! Oh and don't forget faith! Yeah man. I really want some more of that stuff.

It is important to control your thoughts instead of being subject to random synaptic firings. C'mon girl.

So, I'm thinking lots of prayer and help from the H.G.will help me with this challenge.

I'm mildly embarrassed that I'm barely coming to this realization now, but I thought I'd share. Maybe you deal with the same thing from time to time?

rock climbing extravaganza

2010-05-26T11:25:00.000-04:00

One of the things that I'm going to deeply miss upon moving to Florida is our newly renovated Cary Street Gym. I mean, this place is rad.

This is the place that got me back into working out. I go to step class, body sculpt, A.B.S., beach body workout, yoga, Absoglutely, & Boot camp; a different class everyday. They offer the best variety of classes, and so I never get bored!

Last night, Clint and I met up with a couple friends of ours and decided to try out the rock climbing wall at Cary street. No joke, you can rent all the (brand new) gear for free, and if you're not certified to belay, you can grab somebody to do it for you. Sweet. Deal. Clint has never been rock climbing ever before, and he's afraid of heights, but he scurried up that wall like it was no big thang! I was so proud of him! He totally conquered his fear! He's such a stud!

So, I think we're going to start going once a week and make it a tradition. Well, for a month, anyway!

Congrats Neda-Jan!

2010-05-22T00:54:00.003-04:00

In Spanish if you put "ita" at the end of the word, it makes it sort of cutsie. Like, for example, my friend Alba. Sometimes I call her Albita. Or a more familiar example, senorita means little senora, or woman...

Similarly, in Farsi, if you want to turn a persons name into a term of endearment, you put -jan (sounds like John) at the end. So, Neda's name isn't actually Neda-jan. But it is if you think she's the cutest person ever and want her to feel special!

Anyways. Just a little cultural lesson... Ahem.

Neda-jan, is one of my besties and she just graduated from dental school today! Yay! I'm super proud of her. She also just got engaged a couple weeks ago, so things are definitely on the up and up in her world!

In fact, many of my friends are taking big steps this year.

Fizza is starting dental hygiene school.
Omar is starting medical school.
Shawna is planning her wedding.
Marianne is starting grad school.
Jennifer P is preparing to go through the temple for the first time.
Traci is about to have a baby.
The aforementioned Neda is, as of today, a doctor now and engaged.
Nate' is starting a restaurant.
and I'm moving to Florida and starting a business. (I mention myself, b/c yes, I am my own friend.)

This certainly isn't the first time any of my amigos have done something noteworthy. The majority of my Idaho friends are married with children and mortgages by now. Normally, my go-to reaction to these sort of grown up behaviors is bewilderment. (I've been in denial for years about being an adult.)
Instead, today, I'm feeling kind of humbled and proud (can you feel pride and humility simultaneously?). I get that this is a unique and important time for me and some of my buds. I'm grateful that I get to be a witness to their lives and that I have them to be witnesses of mine. They are a type of high grade quality that you don't come across often. Life is challenging, and makes me cry a lot (these days), but it is pretty great, especially when you are sharing it with people who are awesomely fantasticles.

A word about Neda's family: First of all, Neda's grandma is the sweetest and coolest old lady ever. And she thinks I'm pretty neat too b/c I know how to say like 2 words in Farsi. The first time I met her, I made sure to impress her by saying Boosem comb (kiss me) and Hosh mezza (delicious). After that, she wanted me to marry her grandson! ha!

Secondly, after Neda's graduation, her whole family and I went to her apartment for food and hanging out. They proceeded to crank the music and spontaneously dance in the kitchen. I joined in. Why not? It was totally cool.

48 hours

2010-05-21T23:58:00.000-04:00

That's how long my raw/vegan diet experiment lasted.
I'd say it was a success. 2 whole days. My "fast" (I'd consider it a fast, wouldn't you?) was broken with Persian chicken salad (compliments of Neda's mother), edamame, and pot stickers. Yes. Oh yes.
Can you say that you've eaten nothing but raw fruits and veggies for 2 whole days?

Raw food

2010-05-20T20:31:00.001-04:00

Nate' has suggested that she and I go on a raw/vegan diet/cleanse for 3 weeks this summer. I'm often down for a good health challenge. I've been going to my fitness classes pretty regularly, lately and my energy level has been higher. However, I'd kind of like to take it to the next level.

I'm a big proponent of fasting and eating veggies as much as possible, especially the raw variety. I believe that taking a break from foods that don't come directly from the ground to your plate gives the body a nice break. It allows it to clean out some toxins and heal. But don't get me wrong. You vegetarians and vegans out there are missing out. Meat, cheese and refined sugar is the spice of life. I'm just saying once in a while, give it a rest.

I decided to give my raw food diet a test run last night for dinner and all day today. I just want a lil preview to see if I can handle it.

My dinner last night:
I had a handful of almonds and this delicious looking meal:

I went to a pretty hippie, local grocer called Ellwood Thompson's and picked up some stuff from their "Raw Bar". They had 2 things. So, I got them both.
That white junk on the left is raw cabbage with a poppyseed "dressing" and some onions. It was gross.
The stuff on the right is raw "spaghetti"! And it was not bad, surprisingly. It had portabella mushrooms and stringed veggies to pose as "noodles". It just tasted like bruschetta.

Today, I ate almonds, raspberries, strawberries with acai berry juice, and water. Nnnnuts and berries. I didn't feel like consuming any veggies today, so that's all I've eaten. No wonder I kept day dreaming about Feta and steak and macaroni and cheese... Despite the food fantasies, I'm not that hungry and my energy level is normal. You're supposed to feel kind of tortured the first couple of days of eating this way, but then your energy should go through the roof and all kinds of awesome things will happen; like clearer skin, a clearer mind, faster healing of sore muscles and wounds.

I'm hoping that the toxins (read: knots) in my neck and the zits on my face will scram.

If nothing else, this is a good mind over matter exercise. I'll be able to tell if I can do it for real next month. I haven't decided on how long I'm going to carry on this current charade. Probably till Sunday. It won't be any longer than that, as Clint returns Monday. And that event will call for some feasting.

oh who am I kidding?

2010-05-20T18:36:00.003-04:00

Am I actually going to blog every single day? HA!
What day are we on anyways? 5 6?

~~Yesterday~~ 2 days ago was Tuesday. I taught ballet all morning, and tutored bio all afternoon. Twas a long day of giving of myself. Just kidding. I got the moolah too.

Nothing exciting happened except around 10pm, all my belongings sans clothes and car and person (duh) arrived safe & sound in Tallahassee, Florida.

~~Today is~~ Yesterday was Wednesday. I don't quite remember what my day was like, but I think I remember hating it.

Today ~~was~~ is Thursday. Good gracious Sally, my oh my. I am on an emotional roller coaster.

Let me tell you why for the past few days my life has been in shambles:
1. It has rained everyday since Friday.
2. I have had a pile of paper work to do and have refused to tackle it (until today- More on that later).
3. My sweet boyfriend is 2,000+ miles away and I hate it. And I equate it to what it's going to be like when I'm in Florida. and it makes me think I'm not going to be quite the happy camper I originally pictured. And it sucks.
4. I still haven't squeezed baby Vera and probably won't until she's too old to be squozzed anymo'. It's really just unfair and uncool.
5. Hormones.

Let me tell you how I snapped out of it this day (one of my dancers never says "today". Instead she says "this day" and it's awesome).
1. I simply allowed myself to just carry on and cry like a lunatic meanwhile doing paper work-just to see if it might help(???)
2. I looked at the clear blue sky and thanked the heavens for a nice day. finally.
3. I ate an entire pack of raspberries in one sitting. I don't know. I just felt like it.
4. I tackled that pile of paper work, crossed some things off my enormous list and felt stupid for being so (ok I'll admit it) overwhelmed.
5. Who am I kidding here? Hormones.

Day 3

2010-05-16T20:57:00.001-04:00

Oh Sunday, Sunday.
I'm always reluctant to keep you holy...i.e. go to all my church meetings, but when I do, I'm always glad I did.

Sacrament meeting was good, but I was feeling lonely without Clint, and frankly-hormonal as I've ever been. So, afterwards, I skinned out lickity split, hopped into my car and drove away. A voice in my head said, "Turn around and go back to the rest of your meetings."

"NO." I replied.

The voice, "Are you going to blatantly ignore me and go lay in bed, watch Law and Order reruns and feel sorry for yourself the rest of the afternoon?"

"Yes. I fully intent on crying for no good reason for a good 2 hours till I have to go to my former boss's house. It sounds nice."

"Turn around and go back. You know you're going to be glad you did."

"Maybe, but I'm already in my car.... You can't make me.. No. ........ fffine!"

Every time. I swear.

Yeah. Against my will, I returned, went to Sunday school, and loved it; went to R.S. and was super glad I went. Of course. UGH, I hate it when my inner voice tells me what to do and is right about it!

I don't know why I hate it. I just do. I hate being cheered up when I just want to be grouchy. It makes no sense. I realize this.

Actually, I really just hate hormones. They rule my life.

I write this assuming there is not a single man on Earth that reads my blog, including the boyfriend. I prolly shouldn't make such an assumption. It could be embarrassing. Actually, I don't care.

Day 2

2010-05-15T21:22:00.000-04:00

In case you didn't catch it yesterday, I'm counting to 10- Till Clint comes back and till I can stop being so dang productive.

So, against my will, I cried all day long yesterday. I tried not to. And I didn't think I was going to. I dropped Clint off at the airport at 5:30 am and congratulated myself repeatedly on the drive home for not getting emotional, (and also for not falling asleep at the wheel). I taught my ballet classes from 8:30 till 11:00 am and felt nothing but happiness. I came home, and took a nap. When I awoke, I restarted my day with packing and bawling. It continued off an on till 11 pm.

Awesome.

I've been so excited and so focused on things to come. However, it was when I started closing up my boxes with clear tape, I let myself recognize at that moment I was saying "goodbye".

(It didn't help that my awesome friends were too busy for me all day to return a single phone call, and Clint was 2,000 miles away frolicking through hills of green with a 9-iron in his hands. Whatever. I get it. It's not all about me.)

Anyways, let me compile a list of things Richmond that I'm saying farewell to.

1. Spontaneous lunches with Clint. I live 1 mile from his school, so a few times a week, when he has a long lunch, I can just swing by and pick him up. Our fave go-to places: Aziza's, and Lift.

2. My gorge' apartment; favorite place I've ever lived. Except for Spain, but that doesn't count.

3. The James. Yes, I realize that I'm moving to Florida, the Sunshine state; a land of innumerable lakes; surrounded on 3 sides with ocean, but I love our urban river.

4. The fan & Monument Ave. I love driving through there and imagining living in those houses. So pretty.

5. Kuba Kuba, Edo's Squid, Comfort, Cous Cous, Millie's. Good, delicious, soul filling food.

6. Trader Joes. At present there does not exist 1 single Trader Joe's in Florida. The thought alone gives me withdrawal symptoms. (Notice how this is the third food-related item on my list.)

7. The single's ward. HA! YEAH RIGHT!... OK, truthfully, I sorta will miss some of those peeps.

Ok. Hold the phone.
As I'm writing this list, my answers aren't coming spontaneously & without much thought. I'm thinking..."yeah, I'm gonna kinda miss MOM projects, and being in school, and leaves in the fall, and la dee dah..."

Here's the truth. I am so ready for this move my butt cheeks are burning for anticipating the drive. I can't wait to start this new adventure. There are truly 2 things that I'm going to miss in Richmond, that will likely cause me to hiccup and sputter over. They include Trader Joe's and Clint. I'm not going to see Clint on a bi-daily basis. That's going to be an adjustment. I'm not going to get to shop bi-weekly at Trader Joe's. That's going to be...hard. But, Clint will still be very much a part of my new life, and I'll find another grocery store to love. I'm resilient like that.

"What about your friends you cold hearted snake?", you ask? I'll answer that when one of them returns my call. K thanks.

Over and out.

Day 1

2010-05-14T17:36:00.003-04:00

I have a big project ahead of me with a full list of things to do. I am not overwhelmed. I know how to tackle it all. However, here, on my half disassembled bed, I sit and think of shows I can watch online instead, to prolong the inevitable.

I’m afraid of what comes after I accomplish all there is to do. Counting down my last days in Richmond is starting to prick at my heart and my tear ducts.

Clint is gone to Utah for 10 days, and there is so much less to distract me from the task at hand. I want to get everything done before he returns so we can just sit back for one more month & enjoy each other before the LDR (long distance relationship) starts. Opposite that is a part of me that wants to procrastinate. If am scrambling till the last minute to get things done, maybe the reality of this enormous change won’t hit me.

I have my list.

Two tears only. I’m not going to cry today. I need to get moving.

-get a webhosting account
-Incorporate
-Obtain a business License
-Obtain Business Insurance
-Obtain a business checking and savings account
-set up a paypal
-obtain forms needed for social services
-set up to pay sales tax if needed
- Make flyers for RS activity in June.
- Get addresses for every single Preschool in the Tallahassee Area.
- Make and Print packets.
- Mail packets.
- Figure out Mac with converters vs PC with programs situation
- If I go with PC, acquire one.
- Pack up the rest of my apartment.
- Clean apartment.
- Take pictures of empty apartment so I can post them on my blog in a slightly depressing fashion.
- Print most recent pictures of Clint and me.
- Start planning a going away party.
- Start planning Clint’s birthday.
- Order bridesmaid dress for Shawna’s wedding.
- Get Florida Car insurance.
- Get Florida driver’s license.
- Make sure all bills are switched over to new Florida address.
- Make Flyers to put up in local high schools for biology tutoring.
- Consider tutoring for O chem.
- Get O chem. Books back from Fizza and Omar.
- Post ads on Craig’s list.
- Make a list and prepare resume’s and applications for a summer job.
- Plan Memorial Day weekend.
- Get deposit from Sarah.
- Make sure electric is switched over under Kim’s name.
- Study for tutoring this week.
- Plan this weeks ballet/tap lessons.
- Read entire training manual.
- Hang out with Beth Tuesday Afternoon.
- Get U-Haul truck Monday, load her up, send down to Florida with Nate’ and Nate.
- Hang out with Fizza and Neda.
- Get pictures from Saleh.
- Organize all files.
- Take box of stuff to thrift store.
- Take books back to the library.
- Add more things to list as they arise.
- Skype with Dixie.

Aside, from getting a Florida license plate and a driver’s license, I plan on accomplishing this list in the next 10 days. Ready. Here I go.

This picture has nothing to do with this post. I don't know whose cat this is, nor from where I even acquired such a ridiculous photo. It just makes me laugh.

as per request

2010-05-10T23:54:00.001-04:00

I recognize that, yes, I did put these on facebook. So, you've prolly seen these picts already. However, some of you are not facebook savvy (mom) and haven't seen them.

Sadly, this haircut lasted a mere 48 hours. We cut it late Friday night and he shaved the rest of it Sunday night, for school. The good news is, the semester ends Friday, so he's going to grow his hair out and cut it like this again for the summer. "Why did we not just wait till Friday to cut it, so he could keep it for the summer?" You ask? Because we are boneheads. That's why.

Anyways. I don't care what any of you haters (Jake) may say, I think Clint looks dang sexy sporting a curly-blonde-mohawk. And my opinion is all that matters anyway. Behold.

Pioneer woman encounter

2010-05-08T23:47:00.003-04:00

Clint thinks I should rename my blog "Pioneer girl" or "Pioneer Lady"... I'm considering it.
Because I'm mildly obsessed with Ree Drummond and her ways.

That's random and actually has little to do with this post.

Actually, I take it back. It has everything to do with this post. Ha. Tricked you.

Last Tuesday, I had nobody to hang out with. Jen was flying to Vegas. Clint was studying. Neda was getting engaged... literally. What to do?

I knew that Pioneer woman was going to be only two hours north of me in the thriving cuidad The District of Columbia. (Yes, that's DC folks, in case you didn't know.) She was doing a book signing.

On a whim, and I mean, quite spontaneously, I decided to jump in my car and brave our capital's traffic to get an autograph from the one woman on the planet I care to idolize.

I arrived 20 minutes before 5pm to Borders in Fairfax, VA. (This is important to note, b/c I didn't actually talk to PW till 9:30 pm.)

The moment I walked in, I remembered that Ree's target demographic is the stay at home mom. About 98% of the people there were middle aged women with children in tow. It was funny. I am a weird one, I guess. Most girls my age...well, a lot of girls my age are actually moms too by now, come to think of it. But what I was going to say is that most girls my age I think are more interested in .... I don't even know, actually. I'm not like most girls my age.

Forget that. I simply stood there and marveled.

I think that this is why-

I think that most women like PW b/c they're in the same boat as her. They are moms too. Their lives are dedicated to their children and cooking and photographing their lives. They read Ree's posts and they're like "yeah, meee too! I totally feel ya sister!"

(These 2 gals were kind enough to chat it up with me a bit while we shared our space in line. They even held my spot when I ran next door to get my iphone a car charger, since I used up all the battery updating my status on facebook- The lady in green, on the left has a food blog: Love Feast Table)

I'll tell you why I like PW. I like how she writes. I like how when she lays down a sentence you can actually hear her voice and it's funny as all get out. She's real. I like how she embraces life and does nothing halfway. It's like one day she decided to learn to cook and then she became amazing at it, one step, and one day at a time. One day, she decided to learn how to take pictures and little by little she's mastered it. I like how in her story "Black heels to tractor wheels" she took a risk.

I know. This is so cheesy, but she inspires me. Unlike the women who are already like her, I want to be her.

So, I went to DC all alone, so I could get her to sign her name in her cookbook.

I rehearsed in my mind for 4 hours standing in line what I was going to say to her when it was my turn.

Like-
"Did you ever think when you were in LA spotting celebrities that one day you'd be one?"

You know, clever banter like that...

Or maybe something more sentimental, like-
"In black heels to tractor wheels, you followed your gut and left LA to move to Chicago. You left your boyfriend behind, who you loved b/c you had to follow your heart and do something just for you. You took a huge risk. Your story gave me inspiration and courage to take my own risk and do this thing in my life."

Or how about-
"Ohmygosh, I love your red hair, you're so classy! I'm a former ballerina myself, and I too love a nice pair of chaps on a man! Can I [literally] have your autograph! Is Josh single?- 'cause just to be near you and be friends with you, I'd marry him!"

...too much?

Apparently, I thought so too, cause after hours of standing in line. This was our conversation:

Ree: "Hi! I love your skirt!"
Me: Oh thanks! ...wow, look at all your presents! (*a lot of the people gave her gifts?...weird...why didn't I think of that??*)
Ree: *signing my book* "haha...oh yeah..."
Me: Well, you're very loved!
Ree: *hands me my book*
Me: Thanks, nice to see you!
Ree: Thanks for coming!!

Awkward photo... I'm so cool, check me out!

Me...*walking away*. wow. "you're very loved"? what kind of bonehead comment is that?... ... hm that was sort of anticlimactic. Honestly, I was hoping she would ask for my blog address and immediately comment on one of my posts via iphone. She liked my skirt. Cool. I knew she would. We ballerinas love a good skirt. She makes over a million dollars a year on that blog? unbelievable! Well, it's believable... My legs hurt.

Anyways...

Afterwards, I called my good buddy Scott who resides there in Washington. We went to the nearest place that was open past 10pm, Hooters, and ordered some low quality grub. It was really all about the conversation anyways. OK And-let's be honest-the wing sauce.

Hey Scott,

"...Hi!..um I'm um going to be your um.. well your hooter's girl for the evening..."

BAH!!!

I think our waitress knew that her job was sort of...a comedy act. After she was finished being awkward, she was really cute and sweet. Get that girl a sweater!

um... excuse me? Can I get some fries?

And that was my random Tuesday last week.

the word.

2010-05-08T14:52:00.000-04:00

When I was in elementary school I wanted to be a shark specialist.
And when I was in junior high, I wanted to be a writer.
When I was in high school, I wanted to be an interior designer.
And, actually. I still want to be all those things.

Baz Luhrmann said in his cool sunscreen song-

"Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your
life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they
wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don't."

This makes me feel interesting.

I've spent the last 8 years doing a little bit of this, and a little bit of that. I worked as a camera girl at a news station. I worked as a dessert maker at a restaurant. I was a nanny, a painter, then a dental assistant, a tutor, then a ballet/tap instructor to preschoolers. Meanwhile, I got my degree in Biology and Chemistry and a minor in Spanish...

(This is starting to sound like a resume)

I was pretty convinced for a few years that I was going to be a dentist. All my efforts in college were directed at that goal, but true to form, I changed my mind.

Over the course of my life, I have tried on lots of different hats. More often than not, I've been bewildered by all the directions my interests have taken me. However, all along the way there have been a few common denominators. While growing up and intending for a life of mad science, I have repeatedly found myself going back to my basics which include hanging with kiddos, dancing, and dreaming of being my own boss. I've found a way to turn those things into my primary focus and source of income.

It's been in the works for about a year now, but now that the papers are signed, it's time for the big reveal. I bought a ballet company for preschoolers and taking it down to Tallahassee, Florida! I'm franchising a company already in existence here in Richmond which is part of why I'm not staying. Hello, year-round sunshine!

I know many of you are thinking- "wow, that rules!" or "Good for you, Jess!"...or "....gooooood luck...ahem..." "but what about Clint?"

Well, I'll tell you what about Clint! First things first. I cut his hair into a mohawk last night, in preparation for buzzing completely. It surprised both of us how much we LOVE it!! He's keeping it till they make him shave it at school. Secondly, we love each other more than ever. Clint's my bestie and my squeezer. The time is just not right for us to bust out with diamond rings and floral arrangements. This next year is about him focusing on his last year of dental school and graduating. He has boards to study and prepare for and externships etc... More importantly, I'm doing something that is totally for me. We're going to try our hand at the long distance thing. It's 100$ for a round trip ticket from Richmond to Tallahassee so we expect we'll see each other at least once a month.

So there you have it! My goss'!
Over and out.
Before I go, here are some of my darlings.

Having my cake.

2010-04-03T22:19:00.001-04:00

So, some of you know that I really love cake. It's pretty much like my favorite food.... Sigh. Anywho, I just came across this hysterical blog called Cake Wrecks. I'm laughing out loud reading the commentary this lady makes on ridiculous cakes other people have made.

Please, please go to this site and tell me if you're not falling off your chair laughing...b/c I think I may be losing my mind.

Just a kid.

2010-03-28T12:39:00.003-04:00

For a while my dancers have been asking me if I have a baby, or if I have children or if I am a mommy. I answer no, & quickly change the subject to less complicated matters like tendus or plies.

Lately, my girls have been following up with asking me if I have a mommy. The first couple times they asked, I laughed to myself and said "yes," what a funny thing to ask...
Monday, it finally occurred to me what was going on in their heads when I had the following conversation with Sarah:

"Miss Jossy?..... do you have a baby?"

"nooo."

"oh......Do you have a mommy?"

"yyyes."

"Do you live with her?"

"no..."

"why not?"

"uh... b/c I'm a grown up."

Oh, I see what's going on here. One either has a mommy (i.e. lives with her) or is one.

I have since realized that my kids are confused about what I am b/c I am neither. I feel like I give off a sufficient adult vibe... They must see right through me and recognize that the person leading dance class is practically on their maturity level. It freaks them out b/c I'm really tall, and for some unknown reason, I'm in charge.

conversation 2.

"Miss Jossy? Why do you get all the papers?" (referring to a small stack of attendance sheets [as if it's a cool thing to have])

"B/c I'm the teacher."

"AWE Miss Jossy! You're just a KID!"

...

Yay for Spring

2010-03-20T08:54:00.001-04:00

I went running 2 days ago around Belle Isle, and was reminded of a few things.

1. I should run more.

2. Richmond is pretty cool.

3. 90% of the people on Belle Isle in the middle of the day, in the middle of the work week are hippies or homeless.

4. The i-phone can simultaneously serve as an i-pod, a camera, and a phone. Neat.

5. I love old stuff.

(These picts are ACTUALLY taken from the Canal walk, not Belle Isle... but it's all in the same place.)

My bored face.

2010-03-18T17:35:00.002-04:00

Alternative title: This is for you Mare, I know how you're over my lack of pics of Clint and me.

Clint is on Spring Break, so we're getting a lot of togetherness time in.... more than usual ;)
Two days ago, I suggested that we go to a quick 9 hole course and so he could get his golf fix, and I could watch him play, and it would be fun. It was supposed to be a quick 1-2 hour activity, with him golfing and me hanging out in the cart. Literally, at the last minute, two of our guy friends wanted to come too, so it ended up being sort of a long afternoon of the three of them golfing and me bundled up in my blanky watching/spacing out/taking pictures from the cart.

Clint was worried that I was bored out of my mind and annoyed.
Does this face look like the face of boredom?

Clint is always hot-as in, sweating. So it's like 65 degrees out and he thinks it's shorts weather. Good thing I brought my blanky!

Yay!

My boyfriend, is so cute.

To Clint's query, I respond:

1. I am rarely bored. I can sit, staring out into space indefinitely and not be bored. There's too much going on in this head of mine. If you're bored, you're boring.

2. As long as I'm with my monkey, I'm good to go. Boredom is not part of the equation.

update

2010-03-13T14:19:00.001-05:00

I've started taking classes at the Cary Street Gym. They include athletic conditioning, step, body sculpting, and yoga. I kinda love/hate the first 3, but love how I feel afterward. I love yoga, especially b/c my instructor is a genius. I'm determined to not have a weak bod anymore. I am going for a tighter core and a healthier heart. I feel good.

I have also started learning how to swim (the correct way), so I've been doing laps and sitting in the spa a lot.

I just ordered this swimming cap (the hair is suffering).

The boyfriend and I continue to be obsessed with LOST. However, it's going to be a glorious day when it's over.

It's time to begin a new obsession. The boyfriend and I have started the first season of 24. His idea. I was highly skeptical. However, we've watched 2 epi's thus far, and I dig.

We also saw Leonardo DiCaprio's Shutter Island and think it's one of the most brilliant movies ever made.

My little darling girls are learning their recital routines which will be performed in June. As much as I love them, it can't come soon enough.

I'm preparing to move to Florida for the summer. This may or may not turn into a permanent thing.

I'm looking at grad schools for nutritional biochemistry programs and companies to begin getting more lab experience.

I still love to shop at Trader Joe's and make delicious recipes that I find on your blogs.

My favorite color is purple.

I am spending the rest of the day reading the third installment of Fablehaven. (Clint is in VA beach doing a aesthetic dental workshop, so I'm flying solo this sunshiny Saturday)

getting my creative juices on

2010-03-08T22:43:00.001-05:00

I know all you ladies out there are super creative, into crafts, and making cute things...cuz I know you. I've seen your work. Well listen up. I can be creative too ya know. Just b/c I am a science geek, doesn't mean I can't make...sparkly masks out of Styrofoam plates and glitter. I can. And I did.

I opted to sacrifice my Friday with the boyfriend, so my married-with-kids friends could go off and have a romantic night of their own via Texzas De Brazil, sans rugrats.

This is how my night went.

We start out playing Mario Wii. I promptly have my bootay handed to me by a five year old as she shrieks, "Why would you do that!? Why would you DO THAT?"...

And to that I respond..."um. I don't know...."

I'm not really a video game enthusiast, plus it was my first attempt. Ever... I proved to be less than desirable as a gaming partner so we tried the Nickelodeon route.

OK. Have you all watched Nickelodeon lately? iCarly? I'm sorry. LAME. What has happened to my beloved network from days of yore?... I miss Clarissa Explains it all...and The Adventures of Pete and Pete... Salute Your Shorts? Are you Afraid of the Dark? MAN those shows ruled my world. All That??? ROUnd HOUSE?!- (I still totally have that theme song memorized: Whenever my life gets me so down, I wanna go way down, to where the people and the fun never ends...) The Secret Life of Alex Mac was prolly my most fave.

Ugh. Dude. Hannah Montana is seriously ridic.

I couldn't take it anymore. I insisted we put our creative juices to play and bedazzle some disposable flatware.

Behold.

Total success.

At one point the same five year old who was horrified at my incompetence at Mario said to me, "You smell good, I was wondering if I could kiss you."

Score.

My Valentine

2010-02-17T23:11:00.003-05:00

This year, Clint and I agreed to do nothing out of the ordinary this year for Valentine's Day. I was supposed to be out of town for the weekend, plus he's supposedly not big on the holiday. (Really? Cause I thought we had a smashing time at the ballet last year!?...oh yeah, that was just me.)

I ended up, last minute, flaking on my volunteer work, for reasons that are my own, which may or may not include my simple desire to lounge indefinitely with my cutey cute bf...

Amidst acknowledgment that we planned zero activities/gifts for the blessed holiday, my girlish nature got the best of me. I had the following conversation in my head Saturday morning:

"Does Clint hate me and that's why he suggested we forgo the celebration of love?...

Or...
Could Clint's insistence that we do nothing actually be a ploy to get me to expect nothing, so when he actually DOES get me something I'll be surprised...even overjoyed?...

He knows I love surprises...

Could he...possibly....be planning to get me something super great and awesome....even...something that I've been wanting for months by now???...

...

Wait. What if he really meant it though, and gets me nothing, like he said, and I'm getting my hopes up that he's going to surprise me, and I cry when he doesn't, and he's incredulous to why I'm disappointed, when we already established that we weren't going to do anything???

Why am I allowing myself to get worked up like this!?....

Tears...

What the freaking crap. I am crying?"

......

No. It gets better....

So, Saturday, I began the day by confessing to Clint that I was having all these crazy thoughts, and he had to tell me right then if he planned to surprise me or not b/c I was going to cry from the stress of not knowing how to feel... (Let's just say Valentine's Day also happens to fall during a special time of the month for me)...

He was going to surprise me.

AWE. REALLY?

WEEEEEAK!!!!! Man, that boy has got to learn not to give in to evil PMS Jessica! You cannot give in to her! She is not real! Because, at that moment, was I then happy to discover that Clint did, in fact, love me and want to celebrate it? NOOOO. Oh no. That was far from my mind. I was furious at myself for ruining my surprise.

Loser!

OK so, somehow, we made it out of that moment and the rest of the weekend was filled with delicious food, beautiful flowers, movies, my fave chocolate fantasy truffles and these lil babies:

In case you're wondering, yes, this is the little surprise that I've been waiting for for months...yyyyyay!

most delicious chicken sandwhich ever. My creation.

2010-02-17T22:19:00.000-05:00

Fried Chicken Sandwich. Not low fat=literally most delicious sandwich EV.Errrr

chicken breast marinated in buttermilk for a day or two

covered in breadcrumbs, cumin, and curry and salt.

Fried in Olive Oil.

Extra extra sharp cheddar cheese

spread=raspberry jelly + mayo

Lettuce

Hamburger Bun from Trader Joes....

Sounds kind of sick...but it ruled. Trust me. Try it.

kids stuff

2010-02-14T16:22:00.000-05:00

These days, I'm finding myself a little baby hungry, and child fascinated. For those of you who are blessed to be parents, take a gander here and here.

how I intend to spend my weekend

2010-02-05T13:48:00.000-05:00

Not smarter than a 4 yr old.

2010-02-05T12:30:00.002-05:00

As you know, I teach four year old ballet and tap classes. Part of my job is undressing the kiddos from their school clothes into their ballet attire, before class, and then back again, after class. It is a MAJOR chore. This is an age where they want to do EVERYTHING themselves, especially the things they do slowly, or can't do at all. I can't tell you how many times a day, when I'm tying tap shoes that the child will yell out in protest, "I can do it by myself!!!" and I have to pause, let them give it a shot, wait for them to get frustrated and then have me do it after all.

It makes me stop and consider. You know, I would seriously LOVE IT, if I had somebody to dress me....

In fact, I would love it if I had a personal life assistant to do everything for me... shop for me, run errands for me, pay bills for me. Who wants to do things for themselves, anyway?

Yesterday, I REEEALLY ~~wanted~~ needed somebody to do something for me. My car had had a burnt out headlight for like a week, and you know, it's annoying, plus against the law... it needed to be taken care of. So, I asked the boyfriend if he could do it. He was of no help. (The man can give you anesthetic and maneuver a high speed dental drill in your mouth, but can't change a headlight on a Honda... Oh well. I guess you can't have everything. He's forgiven.)

So, I went to Autozone, bought the light, and asked them if they could pop it in for me. No can do. It's against their policy to work on cars. They can only sell you parts.... Nice customer service though.

Can't they see I'm a damsel in distress here!? It's a headlight, people, this isn't brain surgery! It is both quick and simple... You just go out there, open the hood... and do it.

It's just that it's dirty...and I don't want to do it.

So.

Well...

Guess, I'm on my own here.

Guess I hafta get my hands dirty; learn a new skill.

...

Freak yeah!

Look ma, I can change a head light! And I did it all by myself, without any help from anyone!...and I took pictures with my iphone.

Look, don't tell anybody, but that was actually pretty exhilarating. Maybe my four year olds are on to something... Learning something new everyday, and trying to do things on your own is satisfying business.

snowed in

2010-02-02T14:58:00.001-05:00

I've discovered that the trend with Richmond is most of the winter is bone dry, pretty cold, but sometimes warm (last week, it was 65 degrees one day.) If we're lucky we get snowed on ONCE. Everything will shut down for a day, then go back to normal. The snow will be melted within the week.

In December, the day after I flew to Idaho, Richmond got massively dumped on. As predicted, businesses, schools, airports were all shut down for like a day or 2. By the time I got back, in two weeks, it was gone for good.

Last week, the news reports were making a big deal about another supposed snow storm that was due to hit us Friday night. I was totally skeptical. As I said, it was 65 degrees one day. I was like, "everybody is freaking out over nothing. I'm gonna bet it's won't even rain."

Wrongo.

It started snowing around 7pmish Friday night and didn't stop for like 24 hours! 13 inches. It was rad. I stayed indoors for 3 days straight, including Monday, which turned out to be a snow day for schools and many businesses. Luckily, in spite of my skepticism, I prepared for the weekend by loading up on comfort foods and starting the crock pot. It was an awesome weekend full of lounging, naps,reading, watching movies/tv and eating nonstop. Oh yeah.

So, the highways are pretty clear, but all the side streets are a menace to drive on. As a result, some of my dance classes are being cancelled. Yahoo!
AAaaand we're supposed to be hit again this weekend. Love it!

hAppy bday to ME

2010-01-11T22:51:00.001-05:00

So. I turned 27 on Saturday. I know. Weird.

Birthdays. They just keep coming, don't they? Who wants to celebrate getting older anyways?

Kids. That's who.

I was a kid once. TEN years ago. An ENTIRE decade ago, I was getting my first kiss and just about to graduate high school. I was also blond. Hm. Well, that about covers all the highlights of my being 17...

Who am I kidding, I'm still TOTALLY a kid... Totally...

I don't mind being 27, it's just a foreign sounding number. Maybe because I've been 26 for a whole year, and just when I just started getting used to that number it changed on me all of the sudden.

I don't know how 27 is supposed to feel, but it feels very much like 22. I like that number.

I'm 22. Yeah. It's my birthday. I can be as old as I want to be. From now on, as far as you're concerned I'm 22.

AND. Furthermore. January 9, is no longer my birthday-the day I get older. From now on, it's just an arbitrary day appointed to celebrate my awesomeness.

......ANYWAY. Enough about all that. Eee gads, somebody is going to suspect that I'm getting slightly freaked about approaching 30. and I'm not.

So Saturday. What a seriously awesome day. My friends really know how to make a girl feel loved.
My day started out with a birthday brunch at Neda's apartment.

here's me surrounded by several of my closest and most beautiful girl friends. Can you believe how lovely these ladies are?
Neda-me-Laura-Jen=front row
fizza and Mana=back row

The girls and I along with the boys had brunch together: Lil waffles with goat cheese and peaches, salad with feta and black berries and mini quiches! Suuuuper good.

Some of the gang diggin in. That's Austin, Jen, Neda, Fizza and Omar

Here is Neda presenting some darling cupcakes that Laura made to me! Isn't she such a babe?

mmm sugar.

Jen & me

Mana & me

Austin & me

me & Laura (laura was telling me not 24 hours prior to this picture being taken that she was getting a little pale...ummm, so what does that make me? glow in the dark?)

Me & Neda

me & Hassan

Omar & me

Fizza & me

In case you're wondering: yes, I did make everybody take an individual photo with me.

Clint & me. Yes, he has a halo around his head. Don't be fooled, he's no angel. Well, today he was.

After some brunch with friends, the rest of my birthday was spent with Clinton. We watched a couple epi's of LOST, did a little shopping, then went to the Melting Pot. Originally, we only planned to get dessert, but we ended up doing the whole four course meal. Totally worth it.

Here's the chocolate

and the dessert. .... oh wow. It was good.

Our waiter was a sport and took a picture of us :) ha, losers.

OK. Birthdays are cool. I guess. This one was definitely one of my faves. Everybody made me feel really special and loved.

Yes.

2009-12-18T23:38:00.000-05:00

Yes. I am sitting in the back of a pick up truck with a baby on my lap.
Yes. It is actually going down the road.
Yes. There are Christmas lights on this vehicle.
Yes. I do have too much time on my hands that I'm blogging twice in one day.

*Note: During Christmas time, in small town USA it's no big thing to get a bunch of folks together to sing in the back of pick-ups and trailers, while driving through neighborhoods, dropping off gifts. It's normal.

woe is me

2009-12-18T20:15:00.002-05:00

So... If you're very perceptive, you may have gathered from my last post, in my appreciation for "Seriously So Blessed", that I might be feeling a little sorry for myself.

It's true. I am.

I'm not about to get on here and start airing my dirty laundry, but suffice it to say, I'm sorta sad about my current circumstance.

Life is just not all peaches and cream, Dontcha know!

But let me tell you what I have been painfully learning this week!

1. God is always teaching you, it's up to you if you are going to learn something.

2. If you pray long and hard and sincere enough, God will give you answers, and it's a wonderful experience.

3. Getting your sorry butt up a mountain can really cure what ails you, if only temporarily.

These are two of my wonderful brothers, Josh and Jared. (Yes, our parents thought it requisite to name us all with J names.)
Josh's wife is sick in bed (with a cold), and Jared has 2 little boys (and a wife too), but they both took time away from them to take me snowboarding, just the 3 of us. It cheered me right up. Love em.

Family. Isn't it about...time? ;)

Sorry, couldn't resist....but seriously.

hil.ar.i.ous.

2009-12-18T00:12:00.001-05:00

So. I was blogging around and I saw one of my friends complaining about this blog site called "seriously so blessed"... about how it was rude and stuff... of course, that made me uber curious, so, I had to go read it. I'm sorry, but I'm going to bet about 90% of you will find it offensive. I thought it was hysterical. And I haven't laughed much in the past 4 days... just sayin'.

If I move to Utah...

2009-11-20T11:51:00.000-05:00

...this is where I'd want to live.

Although the house is amazing, I almost don't even care! ~ Look at this garden!

here's some more "ewe" for your day.

2009-11-18T15:01:00.000-05:00

Just for "fun"... I did a little bit of research on aphids. (Biology girl here, nerd alert).
I learned that there are 4,400 species of aphids and they all have a variety of ways they reproduce; some are asexual, some are sexual, some lay eggs. Would you guess that some of these BUGS give live birth??? ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? GRROOSSSSSSSS!!!!

Sufficiently sicked out? Here's a picture!

You're Welcome.

the things you do for your babies...

2009-11-18T14:42:00.004-05:00

OK. Right. So I don't have any babies.

But, I do have a tree...

So, my tree got sick. I don't really know how this even happened, but it got infested with aphids. Aphids are the most disgusting little creatures. They are also known as PLANT LICE!!! EWE!!!! They reproduce faster than you can imagine and eat your tree. They are the size of the head of a pin and they congregate on the leaves and buds. From a distance they look like mold... Ewe.

So, as some of you may know from reading The Hungry, Hungry Caterpillar, lady bugs are an aphids worst nightmare.

I ordered about 1500 or so in the mail after my aphid killing medicine failed me.

This is what that adventure looked like.

Behold:

disgusting aphids

disgusting aphid spawn

You can order live insects via snail mail, dontcha know.

Let the fun begin!

Coooool

I bet you are squirming now, right! haha

Little machines gettin down to business!

I didn't even realize, but there was aphid larvae all over the pot too, and the lady bugs took care of it!

Go, go, go!!!

My lucky little friends

Did I mention my roommate hates me now?

I just purchased a vacuum yesterday....

adult make believe

2009-11-13T13:27:00.002-05:00

Last weekend was my friend Brianna's 30th birthday! So, we all got together to play murder mystery!
We all arrived in 1920's garb with memorized parts. I was a 19 year old jazz singer. I just married a much older man, who divorced his wife to be with me. I was using him to make connections while simultaneously having an affair with mobster Al Capone (Clint's character). People were suspicious of me when my husband is murdered, especially when I show up with a black eye (which I actually got from a fall). However, as it turned out, it was the jealous daughter who killed him (Crystal's character).
It was loads of fun.

And guess who won best dressed!? MEEEEE!

at this very moment

2009-11-01T20:34:00.000-05:00

Just chillin' with my baby cakes, watching the Yankees kick some Phillie bootay
+ blogging...good times.

Note the matching New York Yankees Jeter t-shirts! Clint got me a souvenir! ;)

Halloween + new friends

2009-11-01T20:25:00.000-05:00

Since Clint was far, far away in the land of Yankee Stadium, New York City, Friday night, I was here to fend for myself, and spend some always needed time with my girl Neda.

Neda already had a group of people going to the Ashland Berry Farms Halloween Haunt and so I happily tagged along! We also met up up with Clint's sister Crystal and her boyfriend Jordan too.

My very dear friend Marianne happens to be Jordan's sister. Yes we are all connected in the circle of life...ha)

There were thousands (I'm not sure if I'm exaggerating...) of people there. TONS and TONS! We waited in 2 lines for 2 1/2 hours to get in. These are some action shots of us--in line.

Crystal and me

It was really a good time just standing in line catching up with my friends and getting to know Neda's friends better. It was a good dynamic everybody was just talking each other's ears off, laughing, and joking, I loved it!

Scott and Juliette on the hay ride

Scott and Juliette are a ton of fun, and my new favorite people. (Their dog appeared in a prior post) which was the first time I met them. Scott works at West Elm, while being in grad school. He and Jules both have a great eye for interior design. I totally picked his brain about ideas for my current projects. Juliette is so sweet and I feel I could talk to her for hours.

Neda's sister Mona and her boyfriend Stalone (he has a brother named Eastwood, [no joke!]) came too, and I got to know them a lot better too! Stalone is a huge Yankees fan! Mona, like me, is learning about it and finding that she enjoys it too. They're adorable, I can't wait to hang out with them again.

Of course, as always, I was excited to see Hassan and Hasham too. They're such sweet boys.

And so...
When we finally got in, we went through 3 separate haunts. The first one was an outside path that lead us through twists and turns and crawl spaces and paths. The other 2 were through "houses" with all kinds of big and very small passageways where you almost have to crawl through. There were dead ends and many doors to open and go through. It was dark with scary noises, and music and scary monsters that jumped out at you. I thought it was brilliant. At first when people started jumping out and trying to spook us, I was laughing. It was funny, but not scary. After, being in the spooky atmosphere long enough I did get frightened a few times, and screamed out (totally unlike me).
It was so much fun. It was totally action packed. You go through unsure of your footing (it goes way up and way down a lot) and where to turn. You have to feel your way through most of it with little to no light. Plus, it vacillates between being scary loud and eerily quiet. Everything is unexpected. You feel like you're trying to save your life by making your way through an evil enchanted place. Awesome.

After the first haunt I felt I got my money's worth, and was ready to go! It was a bonus that we still had two more to go through! It was all very well done.

This is Mona totally eating it as she was exiting while simultaneously being attacked by the chain saw dude...

It was perfect weather too. It was cool, and foggy, misting rain the whole time (which added to the effect.) (i.e. the dots in all my pics)
LOVED IT.

The girls: Me, Neda, Crystal, Juliette, Tanisha, Crystal, Mona

The boys: Stalone, Hasham, Scott, Hassan, Jordan

It was a perfect night with friends. I can't remember the last time I had more fun, I only wish Clint could have been there too!

Cute lil puff of life

Yay! They won!

2009-10-31T09:38:00.001-04:00

I prayed that, first of all, the Yankees would win, and secondly, that it wouldn't rain on Clint and his dad while they were in NY. It worked! Hooray!
Now, they just have to win tonight, tomorrow, and the next night!... Clint and Pops will be in Richmond in an hour, I can't wait!

P.S. I had an amazing time with my friends last night sans Clint, stay tuned for that post later!

C'mon YANKS!!!!

2009-10-29T17:43:00.001-04:00

I'm going to guess that about 90 percent of you girlies have no idea that the World Series started last night and that the Yankees are playing the Phillies. :) I wouldn't know either if my bf wasn't such a fan- I'll be honest. But here's some trivia. The Yankees haven't been in the World Series since 2002, so this is kind of a big deal. Clint and I watched the Yankees play the Angels almost every night last week during the play-offs and it was intense. I'm pretty sure if the Angels had won, Clint would be so mad he wouldn't even watch the W.S., but they lost and the Yankees won! World Series, here we come!

So... I was suuuper pumped to watch the World Series with Clint this week! Unfortunately, last night was the most horrible/boring game I've ever watched. I basically fell asleep. The Phillies dominated... Their pitcher was amazing and we hardly even got on base, not to mention make any runs. Our pitcher, Sabathia, wasn't doing as well...

Tonight, Clint actually happens to BE in New York with his dad. They spontaneously decided to go and watch (lucky!)... They'll be watching the game in about 3 hours. I'll be watching it here. :( saaaad... I wish I could be there, but it's WAY cool for Clint! :) He's like a kid! He's getting to skip school, be in NYC to watch his favorite sports team play live in the World Series with his daddio and eat hot dogs and funnel cake. I really hope the Yankees pull through and win it for those boys! Clint got me all kinds of emotionally invested in this team, and if they lose, I might cry.

I'm thrilled for Clint that he gets to be there with his dad, and it would just be the icing on the cake if the Yankees beat the Phillies! Go Yankeeees!!!! (and I hope it also doesn't rain or snow on them too while they're there too!)

What I'd really love to know...

2009-10-27T13:45:00.000-04:00

is how I went from this:

-a degree in biology, minor in chemistry, minor in Spanish
+hundreds of dental volunteer hours and work with the dental school with plans to attend dental school

to this:

-teaching 10 ballet and tap classes a week to pre-schoolers.

Don't get me wrong, I am in love with my lil dancers...

You wanna know what's crazy? I am getting paid about the same if not more than if I was working in my field, (assuming I could actually find a job, in this market).

Books and Projects

2009-10-26T09:11:00.000-04:00

I just joined a book club and we're reading Tipping Point. I've read Malcolm Gladwell's other two books, Outliers and Blink and I LOVED them. For some reason, I'm having a hard time getting into Tipping Point...

...Maybe b/c last night I watched the Jane Austin Book Club. I'm so in the mood for some Jane Austin in my life... I've always thought of myself as very much like Joe March from Little Women. She was the one who went off to New York to further discover herself and to write. She was the one who approached life differently than her sisters and other girls, to appease herself. Although, she wasn't always 100% sure of herself. She was the one who took her sweet time getting married and when she did, she married not the man everybody expected her to and pictured her with, but another who fulfilled her in ways even she didn't anticipate... Anyways. Yeah, I love Jane Austin's books...

Wow, so this entry took an unexpected turn... It's just me musing. That's all.

In other news I have several dyo projects that I'm wondering if I'm even going to bother tackling. I have a little couch-thingy that needs to be reupholstered, two books shelves that need a paint/stain job, (which I don't even have yet) and a dresser that needs something. I'm about 90% sure that I'm only going to be in Richmond for another year and a half... A year and a half. ...That's long enough to want to cutify my newly inherited stuff right?
Anyways, I'm open to ideas. I know I'm going to have to research my favorite blogs, like little green notebook for how to's... but here are my pieces.

Does anybody know where I can get wooden veneers for the front of my dresser?

So what do you think? What should I do to these hideous guys?

German pancakes

2009-10-25T12:26:00.000-04:00

The first time I ever had German pancakes was when I went to ISU that one semester back in 2002 and my friend Jennifer introduced them to me. I feel like that was practically all we ever ate too!... Unfortunately, after I moved away I never made them ever again.
Recently, Clinton has happily reintroduced them to me and I love them! They are inexpensive to make and absolutely delicious. Furthermore, when I eat them I think of Jennifer and reminisce on that crazy semester that we spent togetha :) awe.

Here's the recipe

Put 1/4 cube of butter in a deep baking pan in a preheated oven at 350
Mix together
1/2c Flour
pinch of cinnamon
add
1/2c milk
pinch of salt
and 3 eggs.
Put in the pan and bake till the sides rise ~ 15-18min.

Enjoy with syrup, fruit, powdered sugar...jam...

OK...and p.s. I'm seriously the lamest blogger ever these days. I'm sorry. I have plenty of time to write, and have been doing lots of fun things that warrant the taking of pictures and blogging about it...but I just always forget to take pictures and blogging is really out of the question without picts... I vow to improve!

skype

2009-10-14T18:08:00.001-04:00

I skyped for the very first time ever in my life last night. I talked with Dixie and Markus and it ruled, especially b/c at the end of the conversation Clinton came over and got to meet and talk to them too...
Apparently, I got awkward. I felt awkward. This is the thing. My 2 favorite people were meeting, what if they didn't like each other? Ugh. What can I say, I'm a loser sometimes. It still ruled!

...

Do you have skype? If not, totally get it, and then tell me your skype name and I'll tell you mine and we can talk, and I'll try not to be awkward.... eh...

Look good?

2009-10-14T17:19:00.000-04:00

Here we have some baby spinach, butternut squash (mm), pomegranates, walnuts

And some salmon with ancho chili and maple sauce

Wanna try it?

Well then go make it. (Here's the recipe)

[courtesy of ahintofhoney.blogspot.com)

I'm expanding

2009-10-11T10:14:00.000-04:00

So, I LOVE to eat...and I LOOVE to paint and do design projects...and I also enjoy rambling on about the little somethings that go on in my life that don't relate. I'm also an organization freak, so I'm compartmentalizing. I'm making a cooking blog, that I'll probably update once a week and a design blog that I'll likewise update once weekly, maybe more. I like to borrow ideas from other design websites and log them away for my future use.
So stay tuned. Recipes and nesting ideas to come~

enchiladas

2009-09-25T12:50:00.000-04:00

A dear friend directed me to a blog of a fellow Richmonder who cooks. Her blog is called ahintofhoney.blogspot.com
Check.it.out.

I made her enchilada dish. Except, true to form, I made some changes... It was my first time ever making enchiladas....AND they were the best I've ever had. For reals. I get an A for this one. (especially since I made a scallop pasta the day before and Clint pretty much hated it.) But really. One of the best things I've made.

I should have taken pictures, but I didn't, so I'll steal hers...so you get an idea.

Her ingredients with my improvements ;)

INGREDIENTS
2 cups shredded rotisserie chicken (I used the whole thing actually ~ 4 cups??)
1 15 oz. can pinto beans, drained and rinsed
2 cups Monteray Jack, Pepper Jack, or Cheddar Cheese, shredded (Make sure you get a good expensive cheese people, the cheese will make it or break it)
1 medium onion, chopped (yes, the whole thing, and I did a purple one)
1 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil (really you can go crazy with the olive oil, I always do)
2 15 oz. cans tomato sauce
1 14.5 oz. can low-sodium chicken broth
6 Tbsp. sour cream (I actually used plain yogurt and 6 ounces...ha)
dash of cayenne pepper (more for more spice!)
salt and pepper, to taste
6-12 corn or whole wheat flour tortillas (depends on the size)
cilantro, for garnish
pico de gallo, for garnish

DIRECTIONS
1. Preheat oven to 375 F. In a medium bowl mix together chicken, beans, and 1 cup of cheese. Set aside.

2. Preheat oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add onions and saute until soft and golden. Add tomato sauce and simmer until thick, about 15 minutes (reduce heat if it is sputtering violently)*ouch!*. Add chicken broth and bring to a simmer. Remove from the heat and whisk in the sour cream. Season to taste with cayenne, salt, and pepper. Pour about 1/3 of the sauce over the chicken mixture and stir to combine.

++ I added some dashes of lemon juice and like a handful of sugar to the sauce to make it mas delicioso.++

3. Lightly grease a 9x13 baking dish with cooking spray. Warm tortillas by microwaving them for a minute. Divide the filling between the tortillas, roll them up, and place them side by side in the baking dish. Pour the remaining sauce over the enchiladas. Top with the remaining 1 cup of cheese.

4. Bake for 20-30 minutes, until the cheese is bubbling and a brown crust is forming on top. Remove from the oven and serve topped with cilantro and pico de gallo.

Serves 4+

DELISH!!!
This is one of Clint's new faves.

a friendly note

2009-09-24T13:28:00.001-04:00

What is a friend?...

Somebody that you can never say enough nice things about. Someone who is down for whatever [crazy] idea you have in mind, and will tell you the honest to goodness truth. Somebody who makes you feel at home. (Love you Jen)

Somebody who knew you back when you were both a snot-faced 5 year olds; Who, besides getting taller, hasn't changed a bit and can still make you laugh till you pee your pants. [and who won't get too upset that you posted this hideous picture of the both of you...](love you deedee)

Somebody with whom you can be completely ridiculous, whether that means being emotional or being silly, and they get it, & they join you. (Love you Clint)

Somebody with whom you just have a connection and you never forget them. You keep in contact forever & make sure to visit once a year, b/c you just adore them and want to be a witness to their life. (Love you Jen)

Somebody who you believe to be your twin soul, who you recognize yourself in. You just want to eat them up b/c they just make you giggle and enjoy the pleasures of life. (Love you Mare)

Somebody who willingly shares themselves without pretense. Somebody who is always excited to see you, laugh about old memories, and make new ones. Somebody who holds you accountable. (Love you Traci)

Somebody who inspires creativity. Somebody who roots for your success even from thousands of miles away. Somebody who you can pick up from where you left off. Somebody who makes you laugh out loud from just thinking about them. Somebody who receives the telepathic messages you're sending out...seriously (Love you Dixie)

Somebody who is mindful.
who gives you the benefit of the doubt.
who helps you be your best.

These are the things that I value in my current & my future friends.

I have been blessed with some mighty good amigos in my day. I believe that if you want a friend, you first have to be a friend by concerning yourself with her needs. Of course, I'm not a perfect friend, but in recognizing how blessed I am in the friendship arena, I'd like to step it up. I want to more willingly serve my dear friends, being more mindful of their needs and loving them more unconditionally.

Let's be better friends.

2009-09-24T11:16:00.000-04:00

I had jury duty AGAIN this morning, but today it wasn't SO bad. I mean, first of all, I got an appropriate chance to wear a new pair of high-waisted Banana trouser pants that I'm so grown up (not to mention sexy) in. (Well, as grown up as one can be who still obsesses over articles of clothing like a teenager...at times...)

So, get this. Today was the first time ever in my whole life that somebody mispronounced my last name! I was like "puah... WHAT? Are you SERIOUS??"....Tomompson? Thomopson?? BAHAHAHA!!!!! Never, in my whole entire life! Hil.A.Ri.ous.

I got a new computer finally and *ahem* an i-phone with it. I. am. obsessed. I am on my i-phone like white on rice. It's [probably] obnoxious. How did I ever survive without it? I can check my facebook/blog/email/pioneerwoman.com/WHATEVER I WANT, any time I want, ANYWHERE I want. It does EVERYTHING. It's like magic.. It's like a magic box with unbelievable powers offered to me for the betterment of mankind... Does no one else stop to ponder the wonderment that is today's technology?...

My newest toys

Don't stop believin!

2009-09-17T17:39:00.001-04:00

Hold on to that feeeEEeeelin....

Before Valentine's Day last February, I dropped enormous, impossible to ignore hints that I wanted chocolates, flowers, and an evening at the ballet. Clint delivered. It was amazing. Obviously, that night was all about me. Clint, poor guy, suffered through the ballet like a champ. (Believe that we don't have pictures from that night. Losers!) I'm sure that I don't have to explain that I sort of owed him in the entertainment department.

Normally, everything we do together we are equally excited about and enjoy, but my time came; 2 nights ago.

In June, Clint bought us concert tickets to Journey. You know, "I'm forever yours....faithfully...."? I can't adequately describe his excitement. For months, every time the subject would come up he would get giddy and start singing and dancing...and doing this "kemo baby" thing with his fingers...pretty much being embarrassing/hilarious. He's cute.

Like I said, the concert was 2 days ago, and here are a few picts of the event. I'm not going to say that I suffered through it, as he did for me at the ballet. (But I'll pretend, just so he'll think we're even) It was fun, and really cute to see him so excited about his favorite band, but let's be honest. I was more interested in watching Clint than the band. (Not to mention watching all the other die hard Journey fans...hilarious!...the cougars were out that night!)

Here's an AMAZINGLY executed photo (how does one take pictures of stuff far away at night anyways??) of Journey's new lead singer. His name is Arnel Pineda. It's freakish how much he sounds like Steve Perry. I had to laugh, b/c I imagined the members of journey holding some kind of "sound alike" contest at a Karaoke bar where if you won you got to join the band. And Arnel being the lucky winner... I don't actually know how it worked, but I am fascinated... He is spot on.

Old Journey

New Journey. He's totally cute, I like him.

I don't know why, but I dig this pic. It's funny, b/c the old man behind Clint looks like a creepy witch trying to blend into public whilst casting a spell...or something.

Typical.

Yeah, I know. I look either drunk or sleepy. I was the latter.

Somehow, we're often incapable of taking a single picture where both of us look good at the same time. Here you go.

...
Ok. So I think we're even. ...Except that my friend Jen suggested to me today that we go to a murder mystery dinner and I'm totally diggin' it.

prepare to squeal with delight

2009-09-16T14:18:00.000-04:00

What is that?-you may be asking yourself. (No, not the ring, that's my friend Mana's hand)

Is that a child's stuffed animal?

No! That precious puff of love lives!

It is a 4 month old Pomeranian! Are you squealing yet!!!???

It weighs a pound and a half.

And is so snuggly wuggly...

I dedicate this post to my lil big bro Josh. Josh, PLEASE breed Lacy so I can have one of these for my very own!

a borrowed post

2009-09-09T16:19:00.000-04:00

A very good friend of mine had this on his blog and I decided to make it my own, since I liked it so much, and I now share it with you and my commentary as well.

(by Cherie Carter-Scott)

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it’s yours to keep for the entire period.
Oh bodies...they are amazing machines, aren't they? I love bodies. Mine has some things I'd like tweeking, but for the most part, I think my body is cool. I'm glad it's mine.

2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called, “life.”
Present!

3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error, and experimentation. The “failed” experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiments that ultimately “work.”
That's a nice way of putting it.

4. Lessons are repeated until they are learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can go on to the next lesson.
I believe in this principle. You only get so many chances too, so I think it's important to self reflect and be mindful of why you really think things are "happening to you"

5. Learning lessons does not end. There’s no part of life that doesn’t contain its lessons. If you’re alive, that means there are still lessons to be learned.
Maybe that's why the good die young.

6. “There” is no better a place than “here.” When your “there” has become a “here”, you will simply obtain another “there” that will again look better than “here.”
haha... so in other words the grass is not always greener on the other side.

7. Other people are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you
something you love or hate about yourself.
I love this one.

8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.
mmmk

9. Your answers lie within you. The answers to life’s questions lie within you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.

10. You will forget all this.

I rarely do this...

2009-09-09T15:36:00.000-04:00

In fact I NEVER do this...but I'm totally skipping class right now...

OK, but seriously, what kind of a loser skips class just so they can study??? That'd be me. Shouldn't I be at the river or a movie with my cutie cute bf?... L.O.S.E.R.

...my classes are really hard. Yep.

K, that's enough about that. Let's talk about something moderately interesting.

Short story:
Last NOVEMBER I broke my beloved Mac and was too poor to replace it. UNTIL NOW! Now the financial aid is flowing in like sweet sweet wi..grape juice and I have just enough to buy the much needed machine for my academic endeavors. YES.
The end.

K so, it'll be here this week. Don't worry, I'll take a picture of it and make a post. AND I'll be posting way a lot more regularly b/c I'll not have to go to the lib every time I need a computer or steal the bf's...

Things on my mind.

My best friend Dixie, who I feel has been physically distant from my life for far too long and its about time we live within driving distance of each other again,...IS pregnant. I'm totally digging the name that Markus and Dix agreed on for her, especially b/c it was truly I who first came up with the name (although they didn't consciously know this) and I sent it over seas by way of vibes to their hearts. (not sure if I can share the name yet...she can disclose that info if and when she in facts name the child the aforementioned name that I maintain was my idea).

Weddings. Are they REALLY about you, or are they about your parents and your family? Is it selfish to elope? ... Yes. Ugh. As many times as I try to convince myself that it's not... it is. boo.

fyi

2009-08-27T10:10:00.000-04:00

So, you may be wondering what I'm doing with my glorious self these days. Well, I'll tell you.

I have decided that dentistry is not for me, and I'm looking at the grad school route as a better option for my liking.

Meantime, instead of graduating in May, like I was supposed to, with a degree in Biology and 2 minors, Spanish & Chemistry, I decided to take yet more classes. (!?)

I am taking Endocrinology and the last of my Spanish classes, to give me a double major in Bio and Spanish, still with a minor in Chemistry. (I almost considered even triple majoring and finishing out my chemistry requirements...but then I realized there's a point when things start to get ridiculous & people begin wonder...)

I'm still madly in love with the boyfriend, but if things don't go as planned, I may run away to Spain again and attend a grad school there for physiology!...kidding, kidding. OK, actually, not really.

Speaking of Spain, I ate squid and mussels for dinner last night, and it was deeeeelish and reminded me of paella. Oh how I yearn for Spanish cuisine...

That's all.

pretty appreciation moment

2009-08-14T16:52:00.000-04:00

I don't know if you're like me, but when I admire clever creations
another has come up with, I think to myself, "I should totally just make that..." and then I rarely do.
I just came across this lil site and my first reaction was, "*gasp* How adorable, I should order five of these!" But then I thought, "...wait, I should just make these myself!..."

I might actually follow through too, these are so fun!

Dixie... I wish you were here, we haven't done a crafty project together in years!

Not having fun anymore...

2009-08-13T14:54:00.001-04:00

OK not really, I'm fine...but seriously look at this room!
Clint came home from our vacay to find this:

Obviously, his ceiling came crashing down. Thank goodness, he wasn't in bed when it happened cause, I'm pretty sure he might have died. I'm not being dramatic, the ceiling was made of plaster from like the 1930's and it was HEAVY. All the plaster and boards were moved before I took this picture. This brown stuff is insulation?

We cleaned it up and got some fixer upper dudes to come and build a new ceiling last week. They kind of made a mess of the upper part of the walls, so we decided to just repaint his whole room. So currently, that is what I'm doing. Clint is at school and I'm painting. Well, not at this very moment, I'm taking a break....

No such thing as too much fun

2009-08-02T19:30:00.000-04:00

I've been quite the busy, busy girl these past few weeks. Here's a list of my goings on:

Helping Clint purge his closet of awesomely out of fashion attire (but not before trying them on one last time),

Flying to Utah & meeting the parents,

Being lil tourists in Utah

including taking a lil vis to the SLC temple,

asking strangers to take our picture,

laughing at the silly animals who reside in the Hogle zoo,

meeting up with my Utah Jennifer, and going on a hike in the Wasatch mountains, (love you Jen!)

Doing plenty of posing for the camera,

Engaging in a lil friendly competition,

making my Virginia Jen proud,

momentarily looking like I know what I'm doing,

healing the soul via boat in Lake Powell,

pretending to be a photographer (thanks Will! [Clint's brother in-law]),

marveling at God's creative designs, and pondering on how heaven will compare,

sacrificing my body for a moment of joy,

making new friends, (Amy, you're awesome),

looking totally boss behind a boat after learning how to surf,

exploring with this cutie patootie,

loving on this lil guy,

and admiring his endless cool factor.

And lastly meeting my new nephew, Kolden. He's precious.

I'm taking the red eye back to VA tomorrow night. I've had gobs of fun, but I'm ready to be back "home" and in my own bed. Oh sigh.

MONSTER!

2009-07-11T10:10:00.000-04:00

The roomie is out of town and the boyfriend is studying for his boards. I'm all alone on a Friday night, enjoying some solitary time. I'm watching some vampire entertainment while simultaneously tidying up around the apartment. I call the mom, because we had a birth in the family. I'm essentially minding my business when I suddenly cross paths with this revolting creature.

No amount of whining or crying does any good. It refuses to listen and crawl out the window. He won't budge, and neither will the boyfriend. Clinton isn't about to come over at midnight just to kill a "bug". I am on my own, with only the mom's voice of hysterical laughter to comfort me. I have to act. I reach for the mosquito repellent and I spray. I suspect that the cause of death is from drowning rather than poison. It doesn't matter. I pick it up with a bigger wad of paper towel than is necessary and huck it out the four story window. I hope that the fall finishes the job. I don't care that I just littered. I'm proud of my bravery.

What is this thing you may ask? I do not know. I call it a shiver bug. Most insects don't bother me-even spiders. I'm find pleasure in cohabitation among God's many creatures-most of God's many creatures. But this guy. He's a shiver bug. He makes the skin behind my ears go tight and the muscles in my lower back spasm... Ewie ewie ewe.

a lil of my fourth

2009-07-10T13:29:00.001-04:00

My fourth really started on like the second...when I got uber-excited about baking my famous sugar cookies and red-velvet cupcakes, making them 2 days early... and then eating a third of them before sharing them.

So, I can't spell. However, I think whoever decided that independence should be spelled with all e's was just asking for the majority of us to get it wrong. I mean really. IN-depend-DANCE!... It only makes sense.

Here are some gorgy flutterflies at the botanical gardens. It was free to get in, so I made Clint take me. He's so lucky to have me to bring culture and nature into his life... ;) Just joking, he loved it!

HA! Red white and BLUEEE! We're awesome.

Austin and Mana, our friendy friends. They're getting married in a couple weeks, yay!

Here are some random stragglers that decided to come sit on our blanket! Actually, they're friends of friends :) and now they're my friends too! Anyways. I'm the only person in the picture that's not a dental student. Cool.

watching the sparklies in the sky

Clint's Birthday

2009-07-01T14:42:00.000-04:00

Clint had a birthday a weekish ago. It was a smallish celebration, but I think he felt loved. He should b/c I made him a delicious red velvet cake that is a little piece of heaven on earth! Here are some picts of the blessed event.

I'm sorry, but my boyfriend is the cutest person on the planet.

Ha, he's not even joking, everybody's face looks like when you eat this cake.

Notice the hint of delirium in my eyes.
mmmhmmm